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HDC The Movie I, II, IV, V & VI - by Massacre Man
HDC - The Movie
*Massacre Man and Roderick Usher are in a van traveling to the abandoned campsite to pick Illdojo and his new girlfriend, a creepy girl who is a counselor at a camp that has been abandoned for 38 years now* Roderick: If this were a horror movie we'd break down right now. *The van immediately stops* Massacre Man: You had to say that shit in the middle of the fucking woods! Roderick: Well, it's true that this is a stereotype horror scene, it's in like every movie ever. Massacre Man: Well, fuck Dojo, I'm not walking to the fucking camp. Roderick: About now we'd happen upon a creepy morgue. *Massacre Man turns around and begins talking while still walking backward* Massacre Man: Stop talking! Every time you bring up a fucking horror cliche' it happens, now there's gong to be a marathon of "Tales From The Crypt" on tomorrow, I don't want to get torn in half from my asshole up before I get to watch it, so shut the fuck up before... *Massacre Man bumps into the creepy morgue* Massacre Man: Rod, you don't know how much I fucking hate you right now. Roderick: Now, we go inside to use the phone Massacre Man: Whatever, but if you say another word I swear to God you will have suck dick through a straw. *Massacre Man and Rod step inside a dim-lit room, with a body lying on a table, Newb standing over-top of the body, with a power-drill in one hand and a chicken salad sandwich in the other, Rod whispers* Rod: Now he kills one of us and saves the other one to torture and perform creepy experiments on! *Massacre Man pushes Rod and he bumps into Newb, who quickly turns jamming the drill into Rod's eyes, he falls to the ground dying, he then approaches Massacre Man, with Rod's last breath he speaks* Rod: Now the door is stuck! *Rod's head hits the floor, Massacre Man tries to run, but the doors are jammed, he turns and stares at Newb* Massacre Man: God damn it, chain me up. *Newb nails Massacre Man's elbows and knees to the wall and pulls out a series of odd tools, the camera cuts away to Kemal standing in the corner watching the torture* Kemal: DAMN! That shit's whack! |
*Illdojo and the creepy camp counselor, Kasey sit inside of the freshly blood-soaked cafeteria that was the scene of a grizzly murder/rape/suicide/carnival 100 years a go tonight*
Dojo: Listen babe, if we're gonna do anything, you think maybe we should toke up first, to give this a little, ya know, enhancement? Kasey: Sure, do whatever makes you comfortable, I'm gonna go use the bathroom. *Kasey gets up and walks out, Dojo pulls out a bong and inhales, he sits anxiously awaiting the lady he would soon be inside* Dojo: Come on, it's not gonna suck itself. Kasey: Just a minute! *Kasey returns, with no pants, urine still dripping* Kasey: You ready? Dojo: Fuck yeah. *Dojo lays back, Kasey walks over and slips his pants off, Dojo stares at the ceiling in anticipation* Dojo: You know, this is my first time. Kasey: Really? I don't believe that for a second Dojo: Well it's true, whenever I would try the girls would call me weird and they all told me I smelled like weed and strawberries. Kasey: I like strawberries. Dojo: Well, thank God I found you. *Zoom-in on Dojo's face* Dojo: Finally, so this is what it's like to have sex, are you supposed to feel this dry down there? *Dojo looks up, Kasey's skin is gone and she is just a skeleton, the haunting voices of several children is heard throughout the building, foldable chairs and tables start to close by themselves.* Dojo: What the fuck? I'm not leaving here a virgin. *Dojo wraps his arms around Kasey's skeleton, he rolls over on top of her, he kisses the skeleton on the lips and starts to make love to the corpse as the camera zooms out of the cafeteria, the last thing seen is the cafeteria doors slamming shut on their own* |
*The room is entirely dark, the dim light turns on as Newb enters the room holding a blender, Massacre Man's left eye is missing and he has a pair of scissors stuck to a piece of skin dangling from his head, he is barely conscious, Newb kneels down and plugs in the blender, holds his chicken salad sandwich in his mouth and pushes all of the buttons to be sure the blended is working right, Massacre Man watches as Newb then approaches him with the blender and shoves his foot in it*
Massacre Man: No, wait, come on, how the fuck is that an experiment? *Newb gives Massacre Man a grin and turns the blender on low, every few seconds turning the setting up* Massacre Man: Fuck! Stop it! *After Massacre Man's right foot is taken off, Newb switches to his left* Massacre Man: I would kick your ass if I had feet... *Newb turns the blender on, after he's finished, Newb stands and pours the ground up feet into a cup and uses it to wash down his sandwich* Massacre Man: I hope I have AIDS and you just got that shit too you fucking asshole. *Newb turns and leaves the room without having said a word, Massacre Man looks at Kemal* Massacre Man: Why are you just standing there! He cut my feet off and you just watched! Kemal: ... Massacre Man: Why aren't you talking?! Kemal: ... *Massacre Man stops and listens, he clearly hears the Tales From The Crypt theme in the next room over* Massacre Man: Can you pull me off of here so I can watch the TV? Kemal: ... Massacre Man: Fuck you too, asshole. *Massacre Man starts to pull his arms forward to slip off of the nails, he yells in pain* Kemal: SHIT! Massacre Man: That's fucking great! Now you say something! *Massacre Man slips his legs off of the nails and lands on the nubs where his feet once were, he again yells in pain* Kemal: DAMN! Massacre Man: Why didn't you help me? Kemal: ... *Massacre Man crawls to Kemal and pulls the scissors from his head, he jams them into Kemal's foot* Kemal: THAT'S WHACK! Massacre Man: I'll show you whack. *Massacre Man reaches back and grabs the cord of the blender, he swings it around and slaps Kemal across the face with it, he hits the ground and Massacre Man swings the blender at him repeatedly, smashing his brains in* Massacre Man: Now, the Crypt Keeper. *Massacre Man crawls to the TV room in time to catch the middle of the Crypt Keeper's introduction, he smiles* Massacre Man: I didn't miss it. *Just then Newb grabs Massacre Man by the legs and drags him out of the room* Massacre Man: At least wait for the Crypt Keeper's part to finish! *Just as Massacre Man and Newb are out of view The Crypt Keeper's laugh is heard, Newb takes Massacre Man to a door that he kicks open leading to a dark basement, he tosses Massacre Man down the stairs and closes the door* Massacre Man: I think my arm's broken. *A vicious growl is heard from the other side of the basement* Massacre Man: Fuck... |
*Back at the camp, Neverending is standing at the camp, it appears to be before Dojo and Kasey enter the cafeteria as they are walking out of a trail leading from the woods*
Neverending: Stay away from her young man, she's not one of you! Dojo: What? Neverending: She's one of... THE OTHERS! Dojo: Like that Nicole Kidman movie? Neverending: No you fucking idiot! She's dead! She's going back to her world! And she's taking you with her! Dojo: I don't care, dude. *he whispers to Neverending* This is my chance to get laid. *Dojo and Kasey walk to the cafeteria* Neverending: You'll be sorry! Don't come cryin' to me when you're dead! *Neverending approaches the window and looks inside, after a few seconds Kasey walks out and he quickly ducks behind the bushes as Kasey starts to use the bush as a toilet, Neverending intentionally opens his mouth underneath the bush catching what he can, after Kasey goes back inside he looks in the window again* Neverending: That's it... yes... *Faustus runs to Neverending, gun in hand* Faustus: You have to get out of here! There's an escape maniac in these woods! Neverending: No, there's ghosts in these here cabins! Faustus: My patient, Dante, he escaped, he was imprisoned for 20 years! Neverending: There's a murderer in these here woods? Faustus: He never killed anyone, but he's made threats. Neverending: But this kid is in trouble, he's having sex with a ghost woman! *They hear the sound of the cafeteria doors slamming shut* Neverending: Nevermind... Faustus: You have to help me find him! Neverending: I'll stay behind and warn the others, you go find him! Faustus: Thank you, I'll return as soon as he's gone, if I don't come back, tell my wife I love her. *Faustus runs off into the woods* Neverending: I don't know his wife... *A man in a robe approaches Neverending holding a baseball bat, obviously Dante* Neverending: DANGER! There's EVIL! in these here hills. *Dante swings the bat and hits Neverending in the head* Neverending: What the hell'd ya do that for? *Dante does it again* Neverending: Listen you asshole! I'm trying to warn you of the... *Neverending clenches his chest and falls over, dying of a heart attack, Dante looks down and gets a disappointed expression, he continues to the woods* Faustus: DANTE! WHERE ARE YOU!? *Faustus is running through the woods searching for Dante who suddenly appears several feet behind Faustus, Dante giggles, Faustus turns around and pulls the trigger, hitting Dante in the stomach, Dante shreaks and falls over* Dante: Oh my God! It hurts so bad! Why would you do that? Faustus: I must stop you. *Faustus approaches Dante and holds the gun to his face, he pulls the trigger and the gun clicks* Faustus: I knew I shouldn't have shot at all those squirrels! *Faustus kicks Dante in the face and picks him up, he spits out a few teeth and coughs up blood, he starts to make a gargling sound that sounds similar to a growl, Faustus happens upon the creepy morgue, he stands behind a tree while Newb is throwing away the blended Massacre Man broke, after Newb returns inside Faustus opens the small door on the side of the house that leads to the basement, he tosses Dante into the darkness where Dante's growl-like moans are echoed* |
HDC: The Movie 0 or: An attempt to tie all of the stories together
*We return to earlier in the day, Massacre Man, Roderick Usher, and Illdojo are in their van traveling down the road* Massacre Man: Alright, now will you tell me where the fuck we're going and why the fuck I'm driving there. Roderick: Because, it's an abandoned campsite, that's basically a horror cliche' breeding-ground! Massacre Man: Once again, why the fuck am I driving there? Roderick: Don't you wanna see what kind of crazy things happen? Massacre Man: No, I'd rather wake up tomorrow with my dick intact, I have something important I have to do tomorrow. Roderick: What's that? Massacre Man: Don't worry about it, just know the shit's important. Roderick: Ok, but this is important to me... turn left. *The van pulls up to the abandoned campsite* Roderick: What do you wanna look at first? The lake, the woods, the bathrooms? Dojo: Why the bathrooms? Roderick: Well, in "Sleepaway Camp"... Dojo: I know you're gonna drag this out, so nevermind. Massacre Man: You know what we should check out? Roderick: What? Massacre Man: The fuckin'... road home. Roderick: Hold on. *Roderick runs to the lake* Roderick: Just what do you think will be in here? Jason? The Blob from "Creepshow 2?" Massacre Man: Probably fish and seaweed. Roderick: Have an imagination, let's check the woods, maybe there will be a killer in there! Massacre Man: Why would you wanna see a killer? *Roderick runs off into the woods, Massacre Man follows, Dojo opens the back door of the van and sits with his bong and lights up, Kasey approaches him* Kasey: Mind if I hit that? *Dojo looks up, his eyes widen, he exhales the smoke and smiles* Dojo: Sure. Kasey: Thanks *Kasey sits next to Dojo and grabs the bong from him* Dojo: So, what's your name? Kasey: It's Kasey, and why are you here? Dojo: Something about my friend and the bathrooms here, I wasn't listening. But um... why are you here? Kasey: I'm a counselor here, I have been for a while. *Dojo leans forward and looks at all of the demolished and obviously abandoned buildings, he sits and looks at Kasey* Dojo: Cool. *Cut to Massacre Man walking through the woods alone* Massacre Man: Rod, where are you? *Roderick comes running over* Roderick: Right here. *Roderick walks over to Massacre Man* Roderick: Find anything? Massacre Man: No. *A monkey, Zero. Let's out a scream and leaps from the tree directly behind Massacre Man, Zero lands oh his arm, he then swings the monkey over into Roderick's hands* Massacre Man: What the fuck is a monkey doing in the woods? Roderick: What should we do with it? Massacre Man: Shouldn't we take it Animal Control or something? Roderick: I don't know. Massacre Man: I'll get the legs, you get the arms. Roderick: Alright. *Massacre Man and Roderick run out of the woods holding Zero, Dojo and Kasey stand up and watch the two searching for a place to put Zero* Massacre Man: In your movie trunk! Roderick: Then where will my movies go? Massacre Man: On the floor for 20 fucking minutes. *Massacre Man let's go of Zero and opens a box that says "Rod's Treasures" and turns it over, tons of classic horror DVDs and tapes fall out, they shove Zero inside and lock it, Massacre Man reaches into his pocket and grabs his pocket knife, he pokes a hole in the box* Roderick: NO! Massacre Man: What? Roderick: Now it's not water-proof! Dojo: I seriously doubt your movies would ever be under water. Massacre Man: Come on, let's go get rid of this little asshole. Dojo: Alright. *Kasey wraps her arms around Dojo* Kasey: Please don't go. Dojo: Will you guys come back and get me after you're done. Massacre Man: No. Dojo:... Oh well. *Dojo walks off with his bong in one hand and Kasey in the other, Massacre Man and Rod get in the van and start to drive off* Rod: It's going crazy in there. Massacre Man: It's locked in a fucking box, I would be going crazy too. Rod: But still, it's tearing a hole in the chest. Massacre Man: I put the hole there. Rod: He's making it bigger... Massacre Man: Put something heavy on top of it. *Rod looks around and finds nothing, he sits on the box, a few seconds later he stands up quickly* Roderick: It bit me! Massacre Man: Don't put your ass in it's face. *Zero makes the hole big enough to climb out and bite Rod's arm* Roderick: What do I do? Massacre Man: You're the movie expert! Throw it out the fucking window! *Rod opens the back door of the moving van and throws Zero out, he lands in the grass outside of the mental institution* Rod: It's gone... *Rod walks to the front of the van and sits in the passenger seat* Roderick: I think this would be the part in a horror movie where I first get the infection before I start eating people a few hours later. Massacre Man: You think we should go back to get Dojo? Roderick: Yeah, I hope that wasn't the last time we got to see him. *The van turns around and they start traveling back to the campsite* Roderick: I know a shortcut through the woods... |
*Back the mental asylum which Zero landed in front of, Zero makes his way over to the building, slipping into an open window of the lobby, cut to a guard opening a cell door and setting a tray of food on the ground, Dante is revealed to be the one in the cell*
Dante: Do you have a vegetarian alternative? Guard: It's bread and water... Dante: I see... *The guard is about to close the door, but Faustus runs over and prevents him from doing so* Faustus: Wait, it's important, I must speak with him. Guard: Alright, but you go in there and I'll close the door. Faustus: Very well. *Faustus enters, Dante immediately sits stiff and stops showing emotion, the door is closed and locked behind him* Faustus: Why do you feel shouldn't ever speak? Dante: ... Faustus: Is it because you're afraid of what people might think of you? Dante: ... Faustus: Do you have a girlish voice? Dante: ... Faustus: Please, tell me why you sent those threatening letters to those people. *The guard yells from the other side of the door* Guard: Hurry up, I'm trying to get home. Faustus: Yes, I suppose I could return tomorrow. Goodbye Dante, I'll return to speak to you tomorrow. *The guard puts the key into the hole, before he can turn it he is attacked by Zero who continues to bite at him and scratch him* Faustus: TURN THE KEY! LET ME OUT! I CAN HELP YOU! *The guard makes attempts to turn the key but fails until he finally pushes Zero off long enough to turn the key, Faustus leaps out with gun in hand, he aims at Zero then notices Dante running out of the door, he follows leaving the guard for dead* Guard: Where are you going? HELP! *Zero tears off the guard's ear, the guard then proceeds to throw Zero into the cell and kick the door closed, he leans against the wall, worn out* *Cut to Dante jumping onto and holding onto the back of Massacre Man's van* Faustus: You nearly-murderous bastard! *Faustus hops into his pink Cadillac and follows from a distance but misses the shortcut and drives to the normal camp entrance instead, he pulls to the side and stops, he begins to search through the woods for a small while until he notices a group of squirrels which he chases off using 5 of the 6 bullets in his revolver, Faustus then proceeds to further his searches until searching the actual campsite and running into Neverending* |
*Returning to Massacre Man at the bottom of the dark basement with only the sound of Dante's growl-like moans*
Massacre Man: What the fuck are you!? *Massacre Man feels around the ground, he finds a small hatchet on top of the workbench next to him, he uses his somewhat-good arm to throw the hatchet at Dante, the only sound is the hatchet entering Dante's back* Dante: What was that!? Massacre Man: You're a person? Dante: What was that!? Massacre Man: I don't know I think I hear bats, you must have been bitten. Dante: I can't feel anything! Massacre Man; Maybe it was a big fuckin' bat. Dante: You threw something at me! Massacre Man: No, I didn't. Dante: Yes you did! Massacre Man: Well I'm sorry, I'm sorry that you're in a basement growling. After I had my fucking feet cut off and my fucking arm broken. I must have been fucking stoned, I mean who in their right mind would be scared of GROWLING IN A DARK FUCKING BASEMENT! Dante: Why is everybody messing with me today? Massacre Man: Did you just fucking listen? I was nailed to a wall by my fucking knees and elbows and I watched one of my friend's die and the other one's out fucking by far the hottest chick I've seen, ever! Oh yeah, on top of that I'm missing Tales From The Fucking Crypt right now. Dante: I can't feel anything! Massacre Man: Well I can! And it's the worst fucking pain ever. It's like having a baby being delivered through a fucking papercut. Dante: Seriously! I can't feel anything. I think I'm paralyzed! Massacre Man: Good, I'm gonna use you as my human shield, because you're an asshole. *The door opens and light shines in, Massacre Man puts his hand over top of his eyes while his they adjust to the sudden light, Newb stares down at him, then at Dante holding his sandwich* Massacre Man: I hope you get bird flu on top of the AIDS I hope was in my blood. *Massacre Man moves his hand from his eyes to see a shadow approaching Newb, he moves as quickly as possible and slips underneath the workbench, the shadow behind Newb is revealed to be a zombified version of Roderick soon to bite into Newb's shoulder, but he notices in enough time to push Rod down the stairs, Rod stands up and approaches Dante, biting his ear off, Dante screams as Rod takes more and more bites out of him Dante changes quicker, after his transformation Rod loses interest in eating him, instead he uses the hatchet like a handle and carries the zombie of Dante back up the stairs toward Newb, Newb then backs up and runs to the morgue's freezer and uses the shelves like ladders and climbs to the top, Rod stands at the bottom smashing Dante's head into the cabinet, Newb drops his sandwich onto the ground, his eyes widen, he reaches for it but can't get a hold of it, he hops to the ground to get the sandwich, he is then taken down and bitten until transforming, he stands again, the 3 zombies stand and start to make their way back to the basement, cut back to Massacre Man searching through the basement with the light provided by the open door, he is checking the possible weapons to use* Massacre Man: Chainsaw... it's been done. Lawnmower... it's been done. Helicopter... it's been done. *Massacre Man looks down at something off-screen* Massacre Man: Perfect. *The zombies enter the door and come to the spot under the table where Massacre Man was hiding* Massacre Man: Hey, assholes. *Massacre Man is sitting in a custom-made Wheelchair, consisting of two bike-wheels and a folding chair* Massacre Man: Take this. *Massacre Man rolls straight at the zombies and flips after lightly bumping into them* Massacre Man: God damn it! *Massacre Man rolls back underneath the table before the zombies stand up, they can't find him afterward other than Dante, who is staring right into his face but can't reach out any further to bite him* |
*Cut to Faustus returning to his car after dropping Dante into Newb's morgue speaking to himself*
Faustus: They'll expect to get Dante back alive, what am I supposed to do? *He hears some thuds and bumps coming from the cabin Dojo went into with Kasey, he walks over to the window and peeks in, Dojo is huddled on the floor, pantless shaking uncontrollably, Faustus runs to the door and opens it, he kneels next to Dojo* Faustus: Young man, are you alright? *Dojo remains huddled and doesn't reply, Faustus looks over at the corpse that Kasey turned out to be, Faustus gets a slight grin like he's had an idea* Faustus: A murderous psychopath who won't speak... *Faustus runs to his car and opens the glovebox, he pulls out a handful of bullets, he runs back to Dojo and cuffs his right hand to his left foot* Faustus: I'll be right back. *Faustus runs back to Newb's morgue, reaches into the trash and pulls out the broken blender and tears the blades out, he then opens the basement door and hops in just as the zombie of Dante is staring Massacre Man in the face, Faustus shoots Newb and Roderick in the head, he picks up Dante by the hatchet and blows his brains out through the bottom of his jaw, he uses the blender blade to slice off Dante's face, after he gets Dante's face he leaves, Massacre Man is still under the table, seeing everything that had just happened* Massacre Man: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!? *Faustus runs back to the cafeteria and kneels next to the paralyzed-by-fear Dojo, he slips Dante's face over his* Faustus: Perfect. *Faustus picks Dojo up and tosses him into the back of his car and heads back for the mental asylum* Faustus: You know young man, you're saving my ass here, I should be so lucky that they don't pay attention to the inmates at all. I'll visit you to give you therapy whenever possible but you should know, I'll probably get a reward for bringing back an escaped mental patient, I'll be out making new friends and living out what dreams a 67-year-old therapist can in the Bahamas. But I'm sure you'll be fine, doesn't look like you'll need me much, really you just get 3 square meals, a comfortable room and you don't even have to work a minute. You're going to love it at the mental institution. *Faustus arrives at the mental institution, cut to inside, the guard is missing, the break room is shown, two of the guards, Despare and Murderdoll are the only ones in the room, sitting at tables on opposite ends of the room, Murderdoll has her head down sleeping, Despare looks nervous watching her, he walks over to her and sits down* Despare: Hey uh... *She doesn't respond* Despare: Um... *Despare knocks on the table lightly, Murderdoll raises her head* Murderdoll: What the fuck do you want? Despare: Can I tell you something important? Murderdoll: Whatever it is, I honestly, truly don't care. Despare: No, please, um... just hear me out. Murderdoll: Will you leave me alone after? Despare: Sure. Murderdoll: Go ahead. Despare: Well, we've known eachother since middle school, right? Murderdoll: Are you coming out of the closet? Despare: No, please, just listen, this is hard enough without you making fun of me. Murderdoll: Faggot... Despare: Ok... well, we've known eachother so long, I wanted to um... tell you how I felt. Murderdoll: Oh shit... Despare: Ever since I've met you I've been in love with you, since I first saw you I thought you were perfect, I haven't been able to tell you, I've been preparing all day, I mean... I woke up, I practiced in the mirror and everything. So is there any part of you that feels anything for me? Murderdoll: You're fucking stupid. Despare: Wh... What? Murderdoll: We've known eachother since middle school and I've AVOIDED you since middle school. Despare: Why? Murderdoll: Because you're a fucking idiot. What you just said proves it. Despare: You mean, you don't feel anything at all after all I've been there for you? Murderdoll: If you call coming to my house and crying when my dog hit by the car, you didn't do anything, I put the cat in front of the damn car. Despare: Oh... Murderdoll: Now get the fuck out of here. *Despare stands up and walks to the next room, he turns around and comes back* Despare: You know what. Murderdoll: I don't care what you have to say. Despare: Alright, listen up. I was probably the only chance you had at any form of happiness. You just ruined your entire future, you know that? Shooting me down ensured that you've lived for absolutely nothing and when you're on your deathbed you'll just think "Why didn't I give him a chance! Oh why! He could have given me everything but I'm too much of a heartless bitch to give a nice guy a chance!" FUCK YOU! *Despare walks into the hallway, puts his gun to his head and pulls the trigger, Murderdoll's eyes widen and she runs out* Murderdoll: Oh my God I... *Her worries vanish when she sees he missed his brain and is still breathing* Murderdoll: Fucking retard, you can't even kill yourself right. *She pulls the gun out of his hand and blows his brains out with it as Faustus enters with Dojo, his hands cuffed together, he seems somewhat responsive now, they both stare down at Despare's body wide-eyed* Faustus: What happened here? *Murderdoll tries thinking of a response when the zombified guard approaches behind Faustus* Murderdoll: He was a zombie! *The zombie grabs Faustus by the arm, Dojo leaps away and grabs the keys from Faustus, he runs out of the institution and jumps into the car, he uses the keys undo his cuffs and he backs out to head back toward the campsite* |
*Back at the morgue, Massacre Man has his hands over his head just as Faustus leaves, he pulls himself out from under the table and eases himself up the stairs, as he's at the door Roderick and Newb stand up*
Massacre Man: Why the fuck couldn't you be Romero zombies? *Massacre Man closes the door and crawls to the room he was originally captured in, sees the door to the exit, but then looks over into the TV room* Massacre Man: God damn it. *He pulls himself to the TV room and onto the couch* Massacre Man: Still didn't miss the Crypt Keeper. *He looks over and sees a blood-stained fireplace poker sitting on the floor next to yet another victim of old chicken salad sandwich eating fucker, and holds it for a few moments, concentrating on the TV, as soon as the zombies enter the room he pierces both of their stomachs and pins them to the wall as he waits for the commercials to end, the zombies moan at him* Massacre Man: Shut the fuck up. *The zombies slowly ease off of the poker, the commercials finally end as a new episode begins, midway through the intro an emergency news bulletin appears* News Announcer: This is an HDC-station special report, we go onto the scene with our Info-Man, _V_ Massacre Man: WHAT THE FUCK!? _V_: Thanks, Gus. Here I am at the ShankS Memorial Mental Institution where an outbreak of zombism has taken over the building, though the outbreak hasn't started yet, I am, as always giving you the news before any of the competitors. You will hear the first gunshot in... 3... 2... 1 *Sound of gunshot inside of the building, Faustus and Dojo are seen entering the asylum, Massacre Man looks at Dojo wide-eyed* Massacre Man: That's... The fucker I was in the basement with! How the fuck did he get out? _V_: But I can tell you now that the only survivor will be Doc Faustus who managed to use all of the others inside as bait for the zombies to lure them into traps, though we are still in danger as the monkey who caused the outbreak *picture of Zero is shown* has escaped and makes the likeliness of another outbreak very high. *Massacre Man sees Dojo run out of the asylum and take off the mask* Massacre Man: Oh... If I can't watch Tales From The Crypt... *Massacre Man slips off of the chair and crawls to the door, he can't reach the knob* Massacre Man: A little closer... come on... you asshole... *He gets ahold of the door knob but slips off, after his second attempt he manages to pull the door open, he eases his way back to the campsite, he sees the car that Faustus drove smash into the cafeteria, Dojo leaps out of the car* Dojo: TAKE THAT YOU DEAD BITCH! *Massacre Man is relieved to see his friend, he has a smile on his face as he pulls himself forward* Massacre Man: DOJO! *Dojo looks over, his eyes widen, smoke slowly starts to come out of the car* Dojo: What the fuck happened to you? Massacre Man: *laughing* It's a long fuckin' story, think you got time? Dojo: Sure man. *The car catches fire and it begins to spread* Dojo: Hold on. *Dojo runs into the cafeteria and reemerges a few moments later holding his bong, escaping just before the cafeteria collapses* Dojo: Alright, go on. Should I call an ambulance or something? Massacre Man: No dude, I'm fine. Dojo: Ok... Massacre Man: Are you fucking retarded? Of course I want a fucking ambulance. Dojo: Alright. *Dojo pulls his cellphone out of his pocket and dials "911"* Dojo: *Sarcastically and calm, imitating Massacre Man* Yes, I need a fucking ambulance for my fucking friend because he's in a fucking bad shape. Massacre Man: Fuck you! Dojo: Yeah, we're at Camp Chopuhpaula-View, his feet are gone and... he doesn't have feet. Oh yeah, he has holes in elbows and knees. Thanks, bye. *Dojo hangs up and sits next to Massacre Man* Dojo: They're coming. Massacre Man: Fuckin' A. Dojo: So what's the story. Massacre Man: We were coming back to get you, we walked into a house, some asshole killed Rod and... Dojo: Wait, Rod's dead? Massacre Man: No, he's undead now. Dojo: So... he's alive? Massacre Man: No, he's a zombie. Dojo: What? Massacre Man: Just... don't fuckin' worry about it, we're not hanging out with him anymore. Dojo: Should we tell his mom? Massacre Man: I'm not... she got pissed off when I kicked a hole in her TV, imagine the shit she'll say when I tell her I got her fuckin' son killed. Dojo: I'm not gonna tell her, I don't wanna see her cry. Massacre Man: Pussy... *The ambulance arrives, they put Massacre Man in the back and leave Dojo at the camp, he watches the ambulance drive off as the zombies of Rod and Newb stumble through the woods in the distance behind Dojo* THE END? NO, NOT YET. *Massacre Man is in the back of the ambulance, he looks at the back window and sees Zero looking at him through it* *Screen goes black, the only sound is Massacre Man's voice* Massacre Man: FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK! NOW IT'S THE END |
For the hell of it, Body Count (I believe I'm not forgetting)
Roderick Usher-Eye drilled out by Newb Kemal-Head smashed in by Massacre Man Neverending-Heart Attack Guard-Zombied by Zero Dante-Zombied Newb-Zombied Despare-Suicided/Shooted Murderdoll-Used as bait by Faustus Every member that wasn't included-Used as bait by Faustus Survivors Illdojo (?) Massacre Man (?) Doc Faustus __V__ |
HDC The Movie 2: Zero Takes Manhattan - by Massacre Man
*A full moon is shown over a heavily-wooded area, as the camera zooms down an ambulance is shown crashed into a tree, the back doors hanging open, the camera enters the back of the ambulance and moves to the front seat, revealing Zero standing on the shoulders of a dead paramedic chewing on the head of the other paramedic, Zero leers into the camera, the title appears*
"HDC The Movie 2: Zero Takes Manhattan (Desert Bar & Tavern)" *A news program is being shown, __V__ is interviewing Doc Faustus about his triumph over the zombies* __V__: So, tell us about how you destroyed these vile creatures. Faustus: They were psychopaths... and they... wouldn't talk... I had to stop them. __V__: Well you must feel a sense of accomplishment for what you've done. Faustus: Yes, I've stopped pure evil from destroying you all. __V__: Well, there you have it, the boring Doctor Faustus feels good about killing numerous others to save himself. Thank you for joining us, we will return tomorrow with a follow-up on this story, good night. *The news camera turns off, Doc Faustus stands and starts to walk off, __V__ stops him* __V__: Wait... Faustus: Yes? __V__: You know, you could give a better interview. Faustus: I supposed I could. __V__: Well, I am trying to get ratings. Faustus: And I'm trying to stop psychopathic madmen who won't speak from killing innocent people. __V__: You've killed numerous innocent people trying to stop them. Faustus: But at least the psychopaths weren't the ones who killed them. *Faustus then walks off and gets into a car that's not his own, he hotwires the car and drives off* __V__: Why did he take my car? *Faustus stops in front of a small bar that's in the middle of the desert, Faustus gets out and walks inside, somebody walks next to the car, Murderdoll is revealed to be standing with a furious expression and her arms crossed* *Cut to Illdojo being approached by the zombies, he turns just in time to notice and run off, he makes it onto the road and stands in front of a news van speeding down the road, it stops* Illdojo: You've gotta help me! *__V__ opens the door* __V__: Fine, get in, hurry. *Illdojo gets in and they follow the path of Faustus to find the car, they stop at the bar as well, Illdojo gets out and runs inside* *Cut to Zwoti with a young Novarku sitting in a home-library, they are reading from a book* Novarku: I just don't get it. Zwoti: Don't worry, we'll figure it out. Novarku: Thanks for tutoring me and putting up with me for free. Zwoti: I never said this was free. Novarku: What? Zwoti: There's a small price you have to pay. *Zwoti puts his hand on Novarku's leg, she stares, speechless* Zwoti: What's the matter. Novarku: Um... Zwoti: Oh don't worry, I don't bite, unless you want me too. *Novarku gets up to run, Zwoti grabs her arm and pulls her back, he sits her down, and gets on his knees* Zwoti: Did I mention I was a liar? Novarku: Wh... Wh... What? *Zwoti puts his head beneath Novarku's skirt, a loud tearing sound is heard, he pulls his head back and spits out a large chunk of skin, Novarku passes out at the site of her blood, Zwoti ties her up and puts her in the trunk of his car, then drives to the bar* *Cut to Dudeman waking up on a couch in the morning* Dudeman: Shit... I need a drink. *Dudeman walks down the stairs of his home, when he reaches the bottom of the stairs it is revealed that he lives at the bar* |
*Cut to Massacre Man laying face-down several feet from the crashed ambulance, he's unconscious, after a few seconds he lifts his head and rolls over, it seems the paramedics got some work down, his legs are bandaged, his broken arm in a sling, and an eyepatch*
Massacre Man: I'M FUCKING ALIVE! *As soon as he finishes the sentence Zero leaps onto Massacre Man's chest and shrieks at him, Massacre Man uses his good arm to punch Zero off of him, he runs off leaving Massacre Man alone in the dark, Zero taunts him by running all over the woods, his shrieks echoing* Massacre Man: Please! Fuck off! *Zero slowly sneaks up behind Massacre Man, then pulls his sling off and starts pulling on his broken arm* Massacre Man: Fuck! Quit it! *Massacre Man leans backward and grabs Zero by the head and throws him at a tree, a branch falls off and hits Massacre Man in the head, Zero picks it up and starts hitting his head with it again and again until Massacre Man grabs his tail* Massacre Man: I said "Fuck off!" *He swings Zero by his tail and throws him toward the road, he gets hit by the __V__'s News Van in mid-air and is carried with them, after Zero's been dealt with Massacre Man makes his way to the ambulance, he gets on the radio* Massacre Man: Um... a monkey killed the drivers, I need more paramedics. *Just then the two paramedics wake up as zombies, they tear into Massacre Man, ripping his head from his body* |
*Inside the bar, Dudeman sits with a 22 oz. in his hand, he drinks the last bit of it and drops the can on a pile of several others, a band is in a small corner, led by Gorephobia, they are playing soft folk music, everyone who has already entered the bar is sitting at their own respective tables, Doc Faustus is at the bar with a mug half-filled with beer, the bartender, Posher, stands in front of him*
Posher: Hey, you're that guy who was on the news earlier aren't you? Faustus: Yes, as a matter of fact I am. Posher: What was it like? Faustus: What was what like? Posher: Killing all of those zombies. Faustus: Didn't you watch the news, I've already answered that question. Posher: Yeah, but you just rambled on about a psychopath who wouldn't speak. Faustus: You know where he is!? Posher: ...Who? Faustus: HE WOULDN'T SPEAK! HE JUST STARED! Posher: Who? *Faustus grabs Posher by his shirt and pulls him closer so they are face-to-face* Faustus: This is important, tell me where he is! *Everybody in the bar looks over at them* Posher: Please, let go of me. Faustus: TELL ME WHERE HE IS! *He shakes Posher, Posher then stretches his arm back and punches Faustus in the face, he falls to the ground, Posher looks over the bar at him, Faustus rushes to the bathroom to tend to his bleeding nose, Illdojo pulls out his bong, Posher notices* Posher: Hey, sir, excuse me, you can't do that here, put it away or I'll have to call the cops. *Illdojo gets up and goes into the bathroom, Faustus is in one of the stalls* Dojo: Damn it. *Illdojo looks up and sees the pull-down cord that leads to the attic* Dojo: Yessss. *Illdojo opens the attic and climbs in, he closes it behind him, Faustus leaves the stall and stares into the mirror looking at his nose, when the angle Faustus is facing the mirror changes Murderdoll is seen standing directly behind him, she pushes his face into the mirror, breaking it, Faustus falls to the ground, she reaches over and locks the door, she puts her foot on his chest and applies pressure, she sits on his stomach and uses her thumbs to gouge his eyes out, she then picks up a piece of the mirror and cuts his throat, Faustus lays lifeless when there is a knock at the door, she panics, notices the way to the attic, she opens it and climbs up, dragging the body with her, outside of the bathroom Dudeman is standing* Dudeman: I have to piss! *Posher walks over* Posher: That old guy's in there. *Posher knocks* Posher: Sir! Sir! Are you in there? *Posher pulls out his key and unlocks the door, he sees all of the blood and assumes it came from Faustus' nose, Dudeman runs to the urinal and uses it, Posher looks around the bathroom* Posher: Where did he go? Did he run? *He walks to a small window by the sinks and opens it to look out* Posher: I don't see him. *Posher leaves the window open, he and Dudeman walk out, as soon as they leave the room Zero climbs into the window* |
*Cut to the bar, Horrorobsessed is sitting on a stool reading a book and trading looks with Posher, Zwoti sits next to her and starts talking to her*
Zwoti: Hi. Horrorobsessed: Oh, hey. Zwoti: How's it goin'? Horrorobsessed: Um... Fine, and you? Zwoti: Oh, I'm great, what ya readin'? Horrorobsessed: A Tales From The Crypt comic book. Zwoti: Oh, are you into horror stories? Horrorobsessed: A bit. Zwoti: You'll have to visit my home library then, I've got a huge collection, Mary Shelley's Frankenstein, The Raven. *Posher looks over and can immediately tell that she isn't interested, he walks over* Posher: I'm back, babe. *He looks at Zwoti* Posher: Who is this? *Zwoti grins* Zwoti: I see... Nevermind then. *Zwoti walks off to the bathroom, Gorephobia walks to the bar* Gorephobia: Can I get a beer? Posher: Sure thing. *Posher hands Gore a beer, Dudeman yells from the other end of the bar* Dudeman: Another 22 over here god damn it. *Posher tosses it to him* Dudeman: Now you shook it all up, it's gonna be flat. Posher: Sorry man, that ones on the house then. Dudeman: All if forgiven. *Dudeman opens the beer and begins to drink it, he puts it down* Dudeman: I wanna watch Clockwork Orange. Posher: You live upstairs, go ahead. Dudeman: I don't feel like walkin' all the way up there. *Posher ignores Dudeman and turns back to Horrorobsessed* Horrorobsessed: Thanks. Posher: No problem. Who is that anyway? Horrorobsessed: I don't know. Posher: Oh, well listen, I was wondering, since I helped you, can you help me a little? Horrorobsessed: Maybe, what do I gotta do? Posher: I just need somebody to go to this wedding with me, my family makes fun of me for never bringing girls to any family events and I've been to nervous to ask anyone to actually go with me, I was wondering if you could just go as a favor? Horrorobsessed: Sure. Posher: Thank you, so much. I'll tell you more about it in a minute, that guys been in the bathroom a while, I don't want him breaking more stuff in there. *Posher walks to the bathroom and opens the door, as soon as he walks in Zwoti hits him in the head with a chunk broken from the sink, he hits the ground knocked out* *Posher wakes up, tied to the toilet by his feet with his shirt torn off and used as a gag and to tie his hands and feet together, Zwoti paces in front of him* Zwoti: She was MINE! Get it? MINE! You ruined that moment for me, I've never done anything like this to a man before. *Posher's eyes widen, he holds his legs tight together afterward* Zwoti: But you gave me NO alternative! The taste of defeat was bad, but the taste of Drain-O will be worse for you. *Zwoti walks to the cabinet underneath the sink, he opens it to look for drain cleaner, but instead he finds Zero smiling at him from inside the cabinet, Zero leaps out and tears at his face* |
*Murderdoll in the attic, placing the body against the wall, she jumps back when when Illdojo lights his lighter*
Murderdoll: Who the fuck are you? *Illdojo is too preoccupied with his bong* Murderdoll: I'm talking to you, asshole. *Illdojo lifts his head, coughing* Illdojo: Hey... *Murderdoll sits next to him* Murderdoll: Ya know, it's polite to share. *She snatches the bong out of his hand* Illdojo: Ya know, it's polite not to be a bitch. *She pushes Illdojo over onto the ground and lights up his bong* Illdojo: Bitch... So, what'd you up here? Murderdoll: What the fuck do you think I brought up here? Are you retarded? Illdojo: No, just making small talk and it's dark up here. Murderdoll: It's a body. Illdojo: WHAT THE FUCK!? WHY!? Murderdoll: None of your fucking business, that's why. Illdojo: It's a human being! Murderdoll: I know that, I'm the one who killed him. Illdojo: But... why? Murderdoll: Didn't I already tell you "None of your fucking business"? *Illdojo stands and hits something, it's a light for the attic, he turns it on and stares down at Murderdoll and doesn't say a word* Murderdoll: Are you sure you aren't retarded? Illdojo: I... I think. Murderdoll: Shut up, I think there's someone in the bathroom. Illdojo: Oh, ok. Murderdoll: I said shut up. Illdojo: Right, sorry. Murderdoll: Stop talking! *Illdojo stops talking, sits next to Murderdoll, after a moment he scoots closer and puts his hand on her knee and starts to run it up and down her leg, she sits still and glares at him until Dudeman and Posher leave the bathroom, after which she punches Dojo in the face* Illdojo: You know, the last girl I hung out with was a lot less aggressive than you. Murderdoll: You've dated a real girl before? Illdojo: Yeah. Murderdoll: You smell like weed and strawberries! To have sex with you the girl would have to be dead! *Illdojo laughs* Murderdoll: What the fuck are you laughing at? Illdojo: When you hear the story you'll know why I think that was funny. *Faustus starts to move, blood still dripping from his throat, making gargling sounds, Murderdoll and Illdojo quickly stand up* Illdojo: I know that guy! He's a major asshole. *Murderdoll picks up Dojo's bong, breaks it on the ground, gets on her hands and knees over Faustus and shoves it into his head* Illdojo: NO! *Dojo runs to them leans over Murderdoll, putting his hands on her chest, leaning on her ass, pulling her back, he pulls her back and they fall to the ground, Dojo still holds the same position laying on his back, Murderdoll wiggles her way out of his grip* Murderdoll: What the fuck was that? Illdojo: I was stopping you from uh... going crazy on the body. Murderdoll: Why, he was dead anyway. *Illdojo shrugs his shoulders, Murderdoll pushes him to the ground and sits back down, Dojo sits next to her again* |
*In the main room of the bar, everyone is sticking to their own business, Dudeman is sitting at the bar with an empty can*
Dudeman: I need another beer. *Dudeman gets up and walks to the bathroom, he opens the door and sees Zwoti being attacked by Zero and Posher tied up, he turns around, closes the door, goes behind the bar, grabs all the beers he can and walks back upstairs to his room, cut to the band playing, Gorephobia stops, sets his guitar down and walks to the bathroom, he opens the door and catches Zero in his arms, who then proceeds to attack him, Gore falls behind the bar and a zombified Zwoti walks out of the bathroom, Horrorobsessed stands up and starts to back toward the wall, the rest of the band stands and runs out only to be attacked by the zombies of Roderick, Newb, and the paramedics, she runs to the door and locks it then attempts making a run to the stairs leading to Dudeman's room, when she makes it past the bar Gore grabs her leg and she hits the ground, when she looks back a zombified Gore is crawling toward her, she starts to slide back when she hears Posher's voice* Posher: Someone help! *She gets up and runs into the bathroom and slams the door behind her, Zero can be heard scratching the door and shrieking, she unties him, they sit still staring at the door* Posher: We can go into the attic. Horrorobsessed: Why? Posher: I doubt they can fly. *Posher opens the attic and climbs in with Horrorobsessed, they see Illdojo with his eyes focused on something that's behind a pile of boxes* Posher: What are you doing up here? *Murderdoll walks out from behind the boxes* Posher: And what are you doing up here? Murderdoll: Nothing! *She looks at the body of Doc Faustus a few inches behind Posher and Horrorobsessed, then at Posher* Illdojo: Do we gotta leave now? Posher: No, there are zombies down there. *Illdojo falls over laughing* Murderdoll: He's high... Posher: Oh. Murderdoll: So they're really down there? Posher: Yeah. *Murderdoll leaves the attic* Posher: Where's she going? *Illdojo shrugs* |
*Murderdoll leaves the bathroom and kicks Zero across the room, the zombie of Gore sneaks up behind her and tackles her to the ground, she uses the hand that isn't underneath him to hold his head back, Zero stands and charges for her, just before he gets his hands on her, Posher drops a bucket of Zero and puts his foot on top of it, trapping him inside*
Murderdoll: Remind me to thank you later. Posher: Alright. Murderdoll: Get me a lime. Posher: Why? Murderdoll: Just fucking do it! *Posher grabs a lime from the bar and throws it to Murderdoll, she quickly moves her hand from Gore's head to catch it, she then jams it into Gore's mouth then punches it in deeper* Murderdoll: Now get him off of me! *Posher and Illdojo pull Gore off of Murderdoll* Murderdoll: If we can't kill 'em we might as well make it so the fuckers can't bite us. Illdojo: Fuckin' smart. Murderdoll: Fuckin' right. Horrorobsessed: But there's another one. Posher: What? Horrorobsessed: Another zombie, it was that guy who was talking to me. Posher: Where's Dudeman? *Posher runs upstairs, everyone else follows, Posher slowly opens the door to Dudeman's room, when he opens it* Dudeman: Hey, man! *Posher sighs in relief* Posher: I guess the other one left. *Zwoti's zombie grabs Posher from behind, he attempts to escape but he just forces the two of them out of the window at the end of the hallway, glass can also be heard breaking downstairs* Murderdoll: Fuck, they got in! *Horrorobsessed and Illdojo run into Dudeman's room and slam the door, leaving Murderdoll outside, they listen to her from the other end of the door* Murderdoll: Shit... *They listen to the sound of Murderdoll being eaten, she yells* Murderdoll: Fuck you! I'll snap your fucking neck, Get the fuck off of me! You can't even eat someone right you fucking retards! Go for my throat... *The sounds stop* Dudeman: What was that, man? Illdojo: Zombies. Dudeman: What? Illdojo: Yeah... they're like... eating people. Dudeman: That's crazy. *They are both either high or drunk and totally non-responsive, Horrorobsessed is worried* Horrorobsessed: What are we supposed to do? Dudeman: To get out of here? Horrorobsessed: yes! *Dudeman thinks for a minute then looks up excitedly* Dudeman: I got an idea! Horrorobsessed: What? Dudeman: You two get the fuck out of my room, and while they're feasting on you I'll run to safety. Illdojo: I like it, but can I go with you? Dudeman: Sure, well, start runnin' bitch. Horrorobsessed: What? Dudeman: Get the fuck out of the room and save us. *Dudeman grabs Horrorobsessed by the arm and pushes her out of the door, and then closes it, the zombies don't notice her, she sneaks out of the bar undetected, back to Dudeman and Illdojo listening through the door again* Dudeman: Alright, I think we can go now. Illdojo: I'm ready. *Dudeman opens the door and runs out only to be ambushed by the zombies, Murderdoll's zombie enters the room just before Illdojo closes the door, he's alone in the room with Murderdoll's zombie, she's covered in bite marks and one of her hands is missing* Illdojo: Dead girl... *Illdojo slips his sock off and rolls it up, he shoves it into Murderdoll's mouth so she can't bite him* Illdojo: Wouldn't be the first time. *Illdojo tears the shreds of clothes off of her cold, dead body and tosses her onto the bed, he hops on top of her as the zombies break through the door, they pull him off of Murderdoll and pin him to the ground, they proceed to feast upon his flesh, blood, bones, and anything else he happens to have with him* |
*A flashback to earlier shows Illdojo leaving the van and running inside of the bar, __V__ gets out of the van and gets in his car, he opens the glove box to discover he has a message on his cell phone, he yells to the cameraman*
__V__: We got a story, follow me. *__V__ backs out but bumps into the back of Zwoti's car, a loud shriek of pain is heard for a moment, it is then silenced, __V__ drives back the way they came from, after a short drive they go back to the camp, they both get out of their vehicles* __V__: I got a message about a book of spells that can bring the dead back! Cameraman: It's an entire book and it only has one spell? __V__: I guess, I don't know. Cameraman: Where's the caller? __V__: I'm not sure. *Kasey walks out from a suddenly rebuilt cafeteria, fully dressed and back into her "hot-girl-body"* Kasey: That's me. __V__: Excellent, so, what about this book? Kasey: Right, it's this book and there's a spell in it, it brings the nearby corpses back to life. But an evil spirit takes them over and it has to be taken out with another spell. *Kasey tears a page out of the book* Kasey: But that's long and complicated. *Kasey tosses the page* __V__: And how do you know all this ma'am? *Kasey stands stumped for a moment* Kasey: Ya know, you're cute. __V__: Thanks. Kasey: No problem. *Kasey winks at __V__* __V__: So, where's the book? Kasey: I'll go get it. *Kasey walks away, __V__ looks at the cameraman* __V__: PLEASE tell me you got her calling me cute. *The cameraman nods* __V__: Awesome. *Kasey returns with the book* __V__: Ok, so we're gonna start recording this, after I give you the cue, read the spell. *__V__ turns to the camera* __V__: Hello, we're sorry to interrupt PedoFiles to bring you this special report which goes further into the recent hot-topic of resurrecting the dead *__V__ gives Kasey her cue, she reads random gibberish from the book* __V__: Truly astounding. *an axe flies from out of nowhere and hits the cameraman in the head* __V__: ... *Kasey shows a devilish grin to __V__* Kasey: Now you're fucked! *Neverending tackles __V__ and screams at __V__ while slamming his head into the ground, __V__ pushes him off and jumps into the back of the van, he closes the doors and puts on a vest with tons of filled slots for shotgun shells and then breaks the glass on a box on the side of the van marked "In Case of Rival Networks. Break Glass" he pulls out a shotgun and kicks the back door open, he puts the shotgun over his shoulder* __V__: Let's do this. |
*Back in the attic of the Manhattan Desert Bar and Grill, the reading of the book is shown on the TV, the zombies remain zombies but all of the wounds on Faustus heal and he awakens as a Deadite-rip off character, he leaves the attic and goes into the main room, he looks at the zombies that assume he is one of them, they ignore him. Faustus walks to Zwoti's car, the trunk is torn open and Novakru leaps out in deadite-like form, they approach Horrorobsessed*
Faustus: Come give ol' Doc a smooch. *Horrorobsessed starts to run* Novakru: Get back here, bitch! *Novakru chases after her, she tackles her to the ground* Novakru: Now listen, we don't want to hurt you, we just want your soul. Horrorobsessed: Get off! *Horrorobsessed manages to knock Novakru off of her, she gets up and runs to a nearby house, cut to inside the house, there are 2 guys inside the house, one is typing a script on the computer, he has a disturbed yet excited expression on his face, next to him is a young teenager holding a ferret* Ferretchucker: Can I be in your movie? Freak: ... Ferretchucker: C'mon, I could be the evil scientist with a gun that shoots guns that shoots cages that shoots smaller cages that shoots ferrets! Freak: ... *Horrorobsessed runs inside the house, then into the closet, Freak and Ferretchucker sit perfectly still, confused by what just happened, Nova and Faustus enter the house* Faustus: Where did she go? Novakru: Give us your souls! *The two continue to stare, Novakru slams Ferretchucker's head on the desk and then snaps his neck before stepping on the ferret, crushing it, Freak laughs, Faustus grabs his head and slams it into the computer monitor, after a few moments Ferretchucker, Freak, and the ferret stand back up, deaditeishafied, they all go to the closet, they open it and see Horrorobsessed smashed a hole into the wall* Novakru: That bitch! *Ferretchucker sticks his head through the hole and looks out, when he looks to his right, Horrorobsessed swings a machete and hacks his head off, he stops moving altogether* Horrorobsessed: They die like people! Novakru: GET HER! *Horrorobsessed starts running again, only Freak and the ferret chase her, after they begin to catch up, Horrorobsessed turns and tosses the machete, it lands directly into Freak's chest, he hits the ground dead, she stands out in the open kicking at the ferret whenever it comes near her* Horrorobsessed: Stop it! *Horrorobsessed finally stomps on the ferret, killing it once again, she sits on the ground and puts her head between her knees when bright headlights shine on her, she lifts her head and Zwoti's car is charging for her, she rolls out of the way just in time, the car makes a sharp turn after sharp turn trying to get her until finally the car flips, Faustus is driving and Novakru is in the passenger seat, the airbags deploy, Novakru's neck is broken by it, but Faustus manages to get out, he starts to run toward Horrorobsessed when she starts running back toward Freak's body for the machete, she grabs it just as Faustus grabs her leg and flips her off, she rolls over and points the machete at him* Horrorobsessed: Back off! Faustus: Bitch, please! *Faustus puts his hands on the machete blade and pulls it out of Horrorobsessed's hands, Horrorobsessed kicks his hand, which jams the machete into his stomach* Faustus: Y... You bitch! *Faustus pulls the machete out and falls to the ground, he swings it but misses, after a few failed attempts at hitting Horrorobsessed he dies, she looks over and sees the zombies coming toward her, a previously unseen car stops in front of her, the window rolls down, Posher is looking at her with a tired and exausted smile* Posher: Ready to go to that wedding? *Horrorobsessed's eyes widen, she gets in the car, Posher stares forward as he mows through all of the zombies then heads straight for the bar, he drives through it, and crashes right out of the back door, the bar collapses behind them on top of Zero and all of the remaining zombies inside* Horrorobsessed: Thank you! Posher: Wanna know something? Horrorobsessed: What? Posher: Breaking your neck after falling out of a window hurts. Horrorobsessed: Wh... What? *Posher hits the door locks, looks into Horrorobsessed's eyes, his face suddenly changes into a deadite face, he slams his foot onto the gas, the last thing heard is the car's engine roaring and Horrorobsessed screaming* |
*Back to __V__ with his shotgun, he shoots at Kasey who just vanishes and then blows Neverending's head off*
__V__: Haha! *A Massacre Man deadite approaches with head fully attached and chops his gun in half* __V__: Shit... *__V__ hits Massacre Man in the face with the butt of the gun and starts to back toward the cafeteria when the cameraman stands up, bumping the camera onto the ground, breaking it, __V__ rushes into the cafeteria and closes the doors* Massacre Man: Let us in! *The camera tripod pokes through the wall into __V__'s arm, he grabs it and pulls it inside of the cafeteria, he then jams it through the wall which hits Massacre Man's leg* Massacre Man: FUCK! *__V__ runs to the window and hops out, Kasey appears next to him* Kasey: Where ya goin'? *__V__ ignores her and keeps walking* Kasey: I was talking to you. *__V__ starts running, he gets into the woods and he is suddenly tripped when Kasey appears again in front of him and sticks her leg out, she turns __V__ over and sits on his lap* Kasey: C'mon tell me where you're goin'. __V__: I was trying to sneak out until y'know, you started holding me here. Kasey: Oh, come on. You're gonna die either way. __V__: Not if you get off of me. Kasey: They'd get you regardless, now you can stop squirming and we can have sex right here or you can just complain the rest of your life. __V__: What? Kasey: I like to leave 'em smilin', what do ya say? __V__: Get off of me! *__V__ pushes Kasey off of him as the three deadites approach him, he turns and runs, they chase after him* __V__: Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Cameraman: GIVE US YOUR SOUL! __V__: No! *__V__ ducks behind a rusty truck with no wheels in the middle of the woods, he is out of sight* Cameraman: Where'd you go!? __V__: I'm behind the truck!... DAMN IT! *__V__ gets up and runs into the morgue, he locks the doors and runs into the basement, he can hear Dante's growls, he opens the doors leading outside so he can see, he stares at the Dante zombie chomping and chewing his own skin* __V__: Ewww. *__V__ flips him over and pulls the hatchet out of his back, __V__ waits at the bottom of the stairs, Kasey appears next to him* Kasey: Come on, please, let's just get this over with. *Kasey takes her shirt off* Kasey: Come on, give up. *The basement door bursts open and __V__ chucks the hatchet, it hits the cameraman in the forehead, he rolls to the bottom of the stares* __V__: Shove that up your ass, bitch! *__V__ runs out of the side doors and heads back to the cabin as quick as he can, he picks up the piece of paper and hides in the back of the van, he finds the spell and starts to read it just as the ax bursts through the side of the truck and is then pulled out, Massacre Man's voice is heard from outside* Massacre Man: Give me your fucking soul! *Massacre Man hits the van with the ax again* __V__: *Random gibberish from the book* *The page starts to glow and a heavy gust of wind blows through the inside of the van, everything falls silent, __V__ peaks out of the ax-hole, he sees Massacre Man standing outside holding the ax about to hit the van again, he then looks at the wound on his leg* Massacre Man: FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! This is so much fucking better then before, I can fucking see! I'm fucking indestructible! I have feet! This is fucking awesome! *__V__ gets out of the van and approaches Massacre Man* __V__: You're a person, right. Massacre Man: Fuck yeah I am. *Kasey appears next to him and starts yelling at __V__* Kasey: YOU RUINED IT! I was supposed to bring all of my family back! But you ruined it! *__V__ picks the book up off the ground and starts tearing the pages out and smashing it, he drives the ax into the book, Kasey screams and fades away* Massacre Man: What... the... fuck? __V__: Don't ask. Massacre Man: Do you need that van? __V__: Well, it's all torn to hell, the station will give me a new one for a story like this. Massacre Man: So can I like... have it? __V__: Sure, why not? Massacre Man: Thank you so fucking much, I owe you. *Massacre Man tosses the ax into the back and gets in the newsvan, he drives off, __V__ watches him go and he gets back into his car and drives the opposite way Massacre Man does, it's seemingly the end, all of the corpses are shown, all of the killed deadites, Zombified Dante still twitching, all of the chunks broken-bodied zombies Posher ran over, the destroyed book, the car Posher was driving smashed and flaming against the base of a hill far off in the desert with two completely charred bodies inside, then the camera shows a shot of the totaled bar, it zooms in to one spot, Zero pops out of the wreckage when suddenly an axe chops him in half, the camera zooms out to reveal Massacre Man holding the ax* Massacre Man: Fuck you... *Massacre Man gets back in the van and drives off into the rising sun* THE END |
Body Count that I can remember. (Spoilers, obviously)
Paramedics-Eaten by Zero, zombied Massacre Man-Eaten (Later Deadited) Faustus-Throat Cut, eyes gouged, bong shoved in head (Lated Deadited) Zwoti-Zombied Gorephobia-Zombied Posher-Neck Broken (Later Deadited) Murderdoll-Zombied, had sex with Illdojo Dudeman-Eaten, zombied Illdojo-Eaten, zombied Novakru-Smashed, lost her vagina (Later Deadited) Cameraman-Axed, Worked for __V__ (Later Deadited) Ferretchucket-Neck snapped, head busted open (Later Deadited) Ferret-Stomped on (Later Deadited) Freak-Head through computer monitor (Later Deadited) Deadite Ferretchucker-Decapitated Deadite Freak-Machete-Chested Deadite Ferret-Stomped on Deadite Novakru-Neck broken Deadite Faustus-Machete'd, Bleeded Deadite Neverending-Shotgun'd Deadite Cameraman-Ax-Headed Kasey-Destroyed with book Deadite Posher-Burned Horrorobsessed-Burned Zero-Chopped in half. |
HDC The Movie 4 - by Massacre Man
*The opening credits play with some mellow music on the soundtrack, Massacre Man driving the news van through an area more heavily wooded than the woods of the older installments, it is night time, the music stops, Massacre Man looks at the surroundings passing by him*
Massacre Man: I fucking hate the woods. *Close-up on Massacre Man's face, zoom out, Illdojo is sitting next to him with a smile on his face* Illdojo: You can say that again. *Massacre Man slams on the brakes* Massacre Man: WHAT THE FUCK!? Illdojo: Just drive, man. We want to get out of here as much as you do. Massacre Man: Who the fuck is we? *Roderick Usher leans forward onto the seat* Roderick Usher: That would be me. *Massacre Man starts driving, he still looks as surprised as when his friends first appeared* Massacre Man: So uh... what's up with you guys? Illdojo: Not much man, I need to make a score though, I'm running out of weed. Roderick: Yeah, not much is going on. Massacre Man: No, I mean what the fuck is up with you guys, I watched Rod die and I'm pretty sure you were a goner, Illdojo. Roderick: Well, throughout this experience I'd say that you've *Roderick is interrupted by Illdojo* Illdojo: You're fuckin' nuts, man. Massacre Man: BULLSHIT! Roderick: No, it's true. We're in your head, we're like Ginger in Ginger Snaps 2. Illdojo: Fag. You could have said Bruce Willis in The Sixth Sense but you had to pick a girl. Ginger's fucking hot though. Roderick: Especially after she turns into the wolf. *Awkward silence* Roderick: So uh... Massacre, how about these dark, creepy woods. You know in a horror movie you'd run out of gas about now. *The van comes to a stop* Massacre Man: ROD! What did I tell you about mentioning what happens in movies? Even when you're in my head you still manage to fuck me over! If you aren't already dead I would choke the shit out of you. *Massacre Man gets out, slams the door and starts walking, Illdojo and Roderick Usher vanish, as Massacre man exits the screen a shape in the darkness can be heard growling, it's breath rising up like steam* |
*Jenna26 is inside of a cabin in the middle of the woods talking on a cellphone*
Jenna26: Everything is set up... Yeah, I got it... I don't care what she says, bring her anyway... *Jenna26 hangs up and sits in a chair next to a table, there is a knock at the door, she stands up and pulls the door open, Massacre Man is standing outside* Massacre Man: Hey, my van broke down a ways down the road, I was wondering if I could use your phone to call for a tow truck. Jenna26: Sure, come inside. *Roderick's voice is heard, but only by Massacre Man* Roderick: That was a mistake! Massacre Man: Shut the fuck up. *Jenna26 gives him an odd look* Massacre Man: Sorry... I'm just a bit out of it, I had a rough day. Jenna26: Oh? How's that? Massacre Man: Fucking... Um... I got in a fight. Jenna26: Why? Massacre Man: Something about a book and a camp, I don't feel like talking about it, it feels like I've been to fucking hell and back. Jenna26: Oh, sit down, you want some beer? Massacre Man: No, thanks. I don't drink. *Illdojo's voice is heard* Illdojo: I'll take one. Massacre Man: Wait, on second thought, I'll take one. *Jenna26 opens a cooler and tosses a beer to Massacre Man, he opens it and whispers to it* Massacre Man: See what happens when I don't have enough braincells for you assholes to pop up. *Jenna26 gives him another odd look* Massacre Man: What? Jenna26: Um... nothing. *She turns away and walks stands in front of the cabin, she sees a car pull in* Jenna26: Here are my friends. *MissMacabre and Bleeding_AngelGirl get out and approach the house, when they get to the door Bleeding_AngelGirl has a bit of a smile while MissMacabre seems she doesn't want to be there* Jenna26: How's it going, girls? Bleeding_AngelGirl: Just great. Jenna26: Don't feel like speaking, Miss? MissMacabre: Not really. Jenna26: Come on, Disease is coming over, I know you like him. MissMacabre: No I don't. He is the biggest asshole this side of the Earth. Jenna26: Awww, poor baby, *Baby voice* Disease pulled my pants down in front of everyone and they all saw my panties boo hoo. Bleeding_AngelGirl: Is anyone else coming? Jenna26: Tic... MissMacabre: Please take me home now. Bleeding_Angelgirl: Did I miss something, what's your problem with Tic? MissMacabre: I take back what I said about Disease, Tic is the biggest on this side of the Earth. Jenna26: He tried grabbing her chest at Posher's last party, not that there's much to grab. Speaking of that, we should get Posher to put together another party. MissMacabre: Please take me home. Bleeding_Angelgirl: Whose that guy in there? Jenna26: His van broke down. Bleeding_Angelgirl: Oh, he's pretty gross. Jenna26: I know! Massacre Man: I can hear you. Jenna26: We know. *Jenna26 turns around* Jenna26: Well, let's head inside. Bleeding_Angelgirl: Alright. *The girls walk inside, a shot of the car, the odd, heavy-breathing shadowy shape from before is standing behind it* |
*Gorephobia and Ferretchucker are walking by a very small pond in the middle of the woods with fishing rods and tackle boxes in hand, Gorephobia is also holding a lantern*
Gorephobia: There, ya happy now? We get to go night fishing. Ferretchucker: Jerry says that the biggest fish come out at night. Gorephobia: Well, Jerry's fucking retarded. Ferretchucker: No he's not. Gorephobia: Yes he is. Ferretchucket: NO HE'S NOT! Gorephobia: YES HE IS! *Gorephobia pushes Ferretchucket into the pond, he gets caught on a tree root at the bottom and is stuck beneath the water, Gorephobia gets on his knees and sticks his hand in to help Ferretchucker, but in a close-up of his face his eyes widen, a small drop of blood flows from his mouth, Ferretchucker climbs out just in time to see Gorephobia's dead body fall into the water, behind him was Rayne holding a sharpened pipe, Ferretchucket managed to catch his breath while Rayne was pulling the pipe out. He started running through the woods* Ferretchucket: GO AWAY! GO AWAY! HELP! HELP! *Ferretchucker manages to hide within a tree stump, Rayne can't find him, Ferretchucket becomes overexcited with his cunning escape* Ferretchuker: YES! I got away! *He crawls out and peeks around for Rayne to see if he can make it out of the woods, Rayne slowly approaches him from behind, she grabs him by the hair and pulls out a knife, the screen cuts away just as Rayne raises the knife* |
*Jenna26, MissMacabre, Bleeding_AngelGirl, and Massacre Man are sitting inside of the cabin, Jenna and Bleeding_AngelGirl are having a conversation, Massacre Man and MissMacabre are sitting next to eachother and staring off into nothing, Massacre Man looks at her*
Massacre Man: How's it goin'? MissMacabre: Um... good. And you? Massacre Man: Today sucked. *Roderick Usher's voice is heard* Roderick Usher: Try dying, asshole. Massacre Man: I already have! *Massacre Man snaps back into attention and stares off again, as does MissMacabre, when there is a knock at the door* Jenna26: Who's there!? Tic: Us! *Jenna26 opens the door, Tic and Disease enter holding 6-packs* Disease: We got beer! Time to party! Jenna26: We already have beer. Disease: Oh... WE GOT MORE BEER! TIME TO PARTY! *Tic notices Massacre Man* Tic: Who is this douchebag? *Massacre Man ignores him* Jenna26: He's waiting for a tow truck. *Tic says something but it is drowned out by the music Disease has turned on and his shouts of "PARTY!", Massacre Man gets up and walks outside, he sees the shadowy-shape behind the car, he starts walking toward it, he hears Rod's voice* Roderick Usher: It's gonna be a... Massacre Man: Shut the fuck up! *When Massacre Man gets close to the car he is stopped by the beep of a horn, he turns and sees the tow truck, driven by Dude Guadalupe, he walks to the window* Massacre Man: One second, I think I forgot my keys. *Massacre Man runs back inside of the cabin, he looks at the seat he was in and notices Tic leaning against MissMacabre rubbing her leg, the other 3 people there were busy shotgunning the beer cans, Massacre Man walks over, grabs Tic by the shoulder, punches him in the face, grabs his keys, and then scurries to the tow truck, he gets in* Dude Guadalupe: So, what am I looking for? Massacre Man: A news van. Dude Guadalupe: Do you mind if I turn the radio on? Massacre Man: Go ahead. *Dude Guadalupe turns on the radio, metal pierces the speakers and Massacre Man's ears until they get to the van which is now covered in scratches and has a huge gaping hole where the small axe holes used to be, Massacre Man gets out and peaks in the hole* Massacre Man: Where's my axe? *Just then Massacre Man hears the sound of breaking glass, he looks over to see Tic holding a baseball bat, standing next to Dude Guadalupe's side of the truck* Tic: You think you can hit me? *The metal is still pounding loudly, Tic approaches Massacre Man, when he gets to the small gap between the truck and the van he is tackled to the ground by the shape that's revealed itself to be a werewolf, it starts to chew on him, after a small bit he starts walking toward Massacre Man who is paralyzed with fear until the wolf smells the fresh blood coming from Dude Guadalupe's unconscious head, the wolf turns, leaps into the truck and starts tearing at Dude's head, Massacre Man attempts to run but trips over something, he sees his axe laying on the ground, he picks it up and remains seated* Massacre Man: Here doggie! Here doggie doggie! *The wolf starts charging toward Massacre Man, he swings the axe, it takes out both front legs of the wolf* Massacre Man: Fuck if I get trailed by another one of you assholes. *Massacre Man pulls back on the axe and decapitates the wolf, he starts walking back toward the cabin, after he is off-screen, the two dead bodies have begun to grow hair on their wounds, their eyes open* |
*__V__ sits at a computer in the news station typing, he hasn't cleaned any of the blood or dirt on him from earlier that day, the weathergirl, ABnormal approaches him with a bottle marked "Z-Ropis", she sits on the chair next to him*
ABnormal: Hey... *__V__'s eyes are glued to the screen he isn't paying attention to anything around him* __V__: Fuck off. ABnormal: I just wanted to know what happened to you. __V__: Fuck off. *She takes a sip of the water then walks away, __V__ still pays perfect attention to the screen, he stops typing, then presses the print button, he had written an entire film script on what had happened to him earlier that day* __V__: I can finally get out of this piece of shit news station. *__V__ leaves the room and enters the set on which everything is filmed, he watches the ABnormal presenting the weather, he catches her eye and mouths the words "Sorry", she nods at him and enters the elevator, when he gets downstairs he sees a dead body lying on the ground, another on a desk, their mouths, throats and stomachs burned completely open. He walks outside when a man gas mask leaps in front of him* Man in mask: Get back inside. __V__: Why? Man in mask: We're to understand there's a disease broken loose, we have to quarantine this area. __V__: But there's nothing wrong with me. Man in mask: Listen, this will be over soon, just go back inside. We'll take care of this and you get on with your business. __V__: How soon will this be over? Man in mask: 3 days, tops. __V__: What if I don't go back in there? Man in mask: I get to do what I've been waiting to do ever since I started this job. *The man in the gas mask pulls out the AK-47 strapped to his back and points it at __V__* __V__: Well... shit... *__V__ pounds his fist onto the front of the gun making it flip and the back hits the man in the mask in the chin, knocking him down, __V__ starts running, he turns the corner into an alley next to the station, he stops and is face-to-face with a dozen people wearing the same suit and gas masks.* __V__: Fine, I'll go in. *__V__ turns around and walks inside, the men then proceed to bar and block the door to prevent any escapes, __V__ walks past the bodies and gets back into the elevator* |
*Clouds cover the full moon as a light breeze blows through the forest. Cut to The main room of the cabin, MissMacabre is nowhere to be found, Jenna26 and Bleeding_AngelGirl are having a conversation, but it is drowned out by the stereo, Disease is flipping through a CD case, the front door is vibrating as if someone was banging on it, but nobody can hear it, cut to Massacre Man outside banging on the door*
Massacre Man: OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR! *Massacre Man hears footsteps and quickly turns* Massacre Man: Fuck... *The footsteps speed up and get closer, Massacre Man runs to the side of the house, Tic quickly runs past him and hops into the window of the cabin, Massacre Man walks around front* Massacre Man: Fuck, that's lucky. *Dude Guadalupe runs in a similar fashion to Tic and tackles him to the ground, a close-up of Dude's face, his eyes and teeth now resemble a wolf and hair is sprouting up from his wounds, Massacre Man punches him, Dude stands and speaks with a slightly slurred language because of the teeth* Dude Guadalupe: Oh, you're up for a fight? Sounds fun. *Dude Guadalupe tears a rail from the stairs to the cabin, just as Massacre Man stands Dude slaps him across the face with it, Massacre Man gets back up and stumbles to the side of the house to go to the window Tic entered, but there is a dresser blocking his entrance, Dude grabs his foot, cut to Disease inside standing behing Jenna26, he is moving his head to the music, he puts his hand on Jenna26's shoulder and whispers something to her, she nods they walk outside, leaving Bleeding_AngelGirl inside and completely missing Massacre Man and Dude Guadalupe. They get out into the woods, Jenna26 seems annoyed, Disease is smiling* Jenna26: So, what did you want to show me? Disease: THIS! *Disease unbuckles his belt.* Jenna26: Wait, what are you doing? Disease: I'm going to have sex with you. Jenna26: No, you aren't. Disease: Yes, I am. Jenna26: No, you aren't. Disease: Yes, I am. Jenna26: No, you aren't. Disease: Why not? You and Tic did! Jenna26: No we didn't. Disease: That's what he told me, he said you were as loose as a 6-year-old's tooth. Jenna26: Are you serious? Disease: Yes! Jenna26: I'm a virgin... Disease: But, you're mean to everyone. Jenna26: So? Disease: Well, in the movies the mean girl is always a slut. Jenna26: Then stop watching movies and get a girlfriend. Disease: Alright, wanna be my girlfriend? Jenna26: No... Disease: You know what? Fuck this. *Disease pushes Jenna26 onto the ground and gets on top of her, he gives her a devilish grin just as Rayne approaches behind him and slits his throat* |
*__V__ exits the elevator onto the floor where recording took place, ABnormal is sitting on the anchor's desk writing on a pen and pad, he looks around for the owner of the station, he finds a character that is or strongly resembles Neverending*
__V__: Sir... Neverending: Whaddya want? __V__: About us being locked in here. Neverending: Whaddya talking about? __V__: That... *__V__ points out of the window, Neverending looks down at the men in gas masks holding guns and talking* Neverending: How did I miss that. *__V__ looks at the trash can and sees a few empty Jack Daniels bottles* __V__: Probably because you've been drinking all day... sir. Neverending: Eh... You're probably right. __V__: Yeah, do you think there's any way we could get out? I have really got to piss. Neverending: Go here. __V__: I can't. Neverending: Why? __V__: Something about public bathrooms. *The conversation is interrupted by a megaphone outside, the voice of the man __V__ had injured earlier is talking* Man in the mask: Hello, ladies and gentlemen as some of you know, there's a been an isolated outbreak in your station, we believe it entered through the brand of water that's been provided to you. We've yet to figure out a cure but we've discovered it can only be transfered through bodily fluids. If you stay away from the infected and the water, you should be fine. That is all. *The megaphone cuts off, __V__ exits the room and sees everybody in a panic, except for ABnormal, who has headphones on, he taps her on the shoulder* __V__: Hey... You ok? *ABnormal thinks he is talking about when he told her to "Fuck off"* ABnormal: Yeah, I'm fine. __V__: So nothing's um... wrong? ABnormal: Everything's fine. __V__: Oh, good. ABnormal: Yeah. __V__: What are you writing? ABnormal: This... *She shows him the pad, it's just a drawing of Neverending with his hand stuck in the shredder* __V__: That's... nice. ABnormal: I know. So, what are you up to after this? __V__: I'll probably take a shower seeing as it would be 3 days since I had one around that time. ABnormal: Oh... I gotta go now. *ABnormal gets up and quickly walks away, the megaphone turns on again* Man in the mask: We've determined the cure for this outbreak, we have a few men bringing it up the elevator at this moment. *The megaphone turns off, everybody gathers around the elevator, except for __V__, who is trying to catch up to ABnormal, and Neverending who hasn't finished off his most recent bottle, when the men get to the floor, the second the doors to the elevator open the 3 masked men on the elevator open fire on the crowd* |
*We resume the scene of Dude Guadalupe pulling Massacre Man back by his leg, the clouds drift away from the moon, it shines down, Dude Guadalupe holds his head tightly, his body begins making odd movements, he backs away from Massacre Man who then gets up and runs back to the closed door to the cabin, he starts knocking again*
Massacre Man: OPEN THE GOD DAMN DOOR! *Dude Guadalupe, now a full werewolf on 4 legs, drooling, growling, howling, leaps forward and pounces on Massacre Man, smashing him through the door, he isn't moving, Dude stands over top of him and sniffs him when a speaker hits Dude in the head, it was held by Bleeding_AngelGirl, the music stops. Dude leaps toward her, Massacre Man grabs his tail, Dude hops quickly around the room tossing Massacre Man into the kitchen, he reaches up and grabs a frying pan and bashes Dude's face with it* Massacre Man: Haha! Fuck yeah! *Massacre Man continues to swing the pan at the wolf, Roderick and Illdojo appear behind him* Roderick Usher: Wow, this is like Dog Soldiers, you're just like Spoo... Massacre Man: Shut the fuck up! I know Spoon dies! *While Massacre Man is distracted by Roderick Usher the wolf manages to turn and kick him to the ground, he leaps onto Bleeding_AngelGirl and starts to tear at her directly underneath the window, Massacre Man gets up and runs back into the kitchen to grab a huge butcher knife, Illdojo watches Dude feasting upon her* Illdojo: I get what's left of the body... third time's a charm. *Massacre Man runs back out, he hits Dude with the pan, when he turns to bite Massacre Man, the pan is shoved into Dude's mouth, keeping him from closing it, Massacre Man takes repeated stabs at Dude's head until the wolf falls to the ground, Massacre Man stands and turns* Massacre Man: Why didn't you help me? Roderick Usher: We're not solids. We're dead. Illdojo: Dude, that sucks. Massacre Man: What sucks? Illdojo: That. Massacre Man: What the fuck is "that"? *Illdojo points behind Massacre Man, when he turns he is face-to-face with a full wolf version of Bleeding_AngelGirl* |
*__V__ hears the gun shots just as he enters the room ABnormal walked into, they both quickly drop to the floor to avoid being shot and they hide under the desk, they whisper to eachother*
__V__: I didn't mean that I haven't showered for 3 days at this moment. ABnormal: Shut up, I don't want to get shot. __V__: Just listen for a minute. ABnormal: Please stop talking. __V__: I'm trying to explain something to you. ABnormal: Not now. __V__: Yes now. ABnormal: Stop talking! __V__: I will when I'm done. ABnormal: You're gonna make them find us __V__: No I'm not. *They hear the sound of the door closing to the room they're in, somebody has just entered, they both stop whispering to eachother, cut to two of the men standing in the lobby searching the other rooms, they hear the sound of a desk hitting the ground and 2 gunshots, the man walks out in the mask* Masked Man #1: That's all of 'em. I got the last 2. Masked Man #2: Great, let's get home, I heard that Tales From The Crypt is gonna be on tonight. Masked Man #3: Hold on, rookie. Let's check out your work. *The second and third man enter, the first stays, the two men enter a room and find a man in a white T-Shirt and boxers laying on the ground, the desk had smashed his head to pieces, Masked Man #3 kneels next to the body* Masked Man #3: Ok, where's the other one? *Zoom-Out, Masked Man #1 is standing behind him, he slips off the mask, it's really __V__ in the suit* __V__: I don't know, I guess she got away. *Masked Man #3 turns to __V__, just as they're face-to-face __V__ blows his brains out, __V__ throws his gun to the ground and snatches #2's, he hits him across the face with it, knocking him to his knees, __V__ grabs him and smashes his face against the doorknob until the mask breaks and he hears the bones shatter, __V__ walks over to the closet and opens it, ABnormal steps out* ABnormal: Did you get shot? Did you shoot him? I heard gunshots. *__V__ points to two bulletholes in the ceiling and then at Masked Man #3, the walkie talkie on #3 has beeps* Man in The Mask: Is the building clear? *__V__ looks at ABnormal and grins* __V__: One second... *__V__ walks over to the walkie talkie and picks it up and answers the man's question with a calm, serious "Fuck you"* |
*MissMacabre is sitting inside of a small room in the cabin, sitting on a bed, the window is wide-open, she is talking on a cell phone*
MissMacabre: Can you please come and get me?... Alright... Fine... Thanks Anyway... Bye. *MissMacabre hangs up and starts walking toward the door, she hears a noise, when she turns Tic is standing next to the window, his eyes a bright yellow and his teeth pointy* Tic: Howdy. *MissMacabre turns but Tic quickly dives forward and blocks the door, she tries making a run for the window, but Tic grabs her leg and trips her, while she is getting up Tic slides a dresser in front of the window, he tosses MissMacabre onto the bed* MissMacabre: Let me go. Tic: Now, to me, that sounds like a favor. Which i don't believe I owe you. MissMacabre: Why not? Tic: Oh, because you didn't give me anything I wanted. MissMacabre: Like what? Tic: Your body. MissMacabre: No. Tic: Then you can't leave. MissMacabre: But I would have to lose my virginity to you, all you have to do is stand there while I open a door. Tic: Why? I never got what I wanted, I didn't even want sex, I just wanted to feel you up, but then you whine about it and get that fat fuck to punch me. MissMacabre: I didn't ask him to. Tic: Bullshit! I bet you told him to, I bet you fucked him! MissMacabre: EWWWW! Why would I do that? *A beam of moonlight shines in, Tic takes a step back away from the bed* Tic: That would have been... bad. MissMacabre: What? Tic: The light from the full moon, I would have been a wolf. MissMacabre: How do you know that? Tic: Instincts. Know what they're telling me now? MissMacabre: What? Tic: To FUCK! *Tic leaps forward but is caught by the moonlight, he starts to transform, the wolf approaches MissMacabre when Massacre Man is smashed through the door once again* Massacre Man: What the fuck is with you guys and doors? |
*A shot of a dimly-lit room, on one end Jenna26's hands are nailed to a chair, on the other Ferretchucker is hanging by his feet from the ceiling with a knife jammed deep into his shoulder, they are both unconscious, Rayne enters holding a pair of hedge clippers, there is a knock at the door she just entered, she sets the clippers on the table and opens the door, a voice can be heard but the person can't be seen*
Voice: Excuse me, ma'am. Oh... you have a bit of blood on your shirt. I'm with the local police department and there have reports of people vanishing around this area, would you happen to know anything about it? One of the people missing is a little kid that looks like that one. *A shot of Ferretchucker, blood still dripping from his shoulder* Voice: So, do you know anything about it? *Rayne shakes her head* Voice: Mind if I come in? *Rayne nods* Voice: Thanks, ma'am. *The officer enters, it's Vodstok* Vodstok: Well, I've got photographs of the folks that are missing you can take a look at. *Jenna26 opens her eyes and tries mouthing the word "Help" to him while Rayne has her back turned to her, Vodstok doesn't read Jenna's lips correctly* Vodstok: What's that about felt? *Vodstok takes a seat in the middle of the room next to a table with the heads of Gorephobia and Disease sitting on top of it* Vodstok: Cool props, do you work in movies or something? *Rayne shakes her head* Vodstok: Oh well, anyway they're pretty nice. *Rayne nods* Vodstok: So, have you seen these people? *Vodstok shows pictures, included are Ferretchuker, Gorephobia, Gary Coleman, 7 from "Married With Children", and Austin34879365638026478976586285689265926597265912 69756, Rayne shakes her head* Vodstok: Well, I guess I should be going then. *Vodstok stands up, turns and looks at Ferretchucker hanging by his feet* Vodstok: Oh my god... *Rayne reaches underneath the table and pulls out a gigantic chainsaw, just as she is about to start it, Vodstok speaks* Vodstok: These kids and their bondage play these days, ya know? *Rayne shrugs her shoulders* Vodstok: I blame it on that Eli Roth. *Rayne nods in agreement* Vodstok: Well, this was a nice conversation, I guess I'll get going. Thank you for allowing me in your home. *Vodstok exits, Rayne watches him leave, when she turns Ferretchucker is gone, the knife from his shoulder is sitting on the floor, Rayne enters the room with a somewhat panicked look, Ferretchucker leaps from under the table with the hulking chainsaw, he starts it up, but since he is a small boy he falls straight forward when he charges at her and lands face-first on the chainsaw, his head is slpit in two, Vodstok hears the noise from outside and rushes in, he sees Ferretchucker's body on the ground* Vodstok: Jesus Christ, what a horrible accident! I'll alert someone right away. *Vodstok picks up his walkie talkie, Rayne yanks the nail from Jenna's hand and shoves it through Vodstok's eye, he shouts in pain, when he hits the ground it is driven in further, which kills him, Rayne picks up the chainsaw and finishes her off by splitting her in half from the bottom up* |
*__V__ tosses the walkie down, turns and moves onto the next room, a shot of the masked man, he has a 12 on his shirt, he calls over another one of the men, he has a 7 on his shirt*
Masked Man #12: I want you and your lower ranking officers to go inside and see what he's done, stay alert, I don't want to have repopulate my entire fucking unit because you guys can't pay attention. Masked Man #7: Yes, sir. *#7 waves over #4, #5, and #6, they enter with guns in hand, they enter the lobby and get into the elevator, when they get to the top Neverending is waiting at the door, he empties the entire gun into #4 who hits the ground a bullet-riddled blood-soaked corpse, when he falls his hand drags across the floor buttons on the elevator, the remaining 3 are about to draw there guns when the door closes and goes up* Neverending: Heh Heh, gotcha. *Cut to __V__ and ABnormal running down a flight of stairs, they make it to the back door, they walk out and peak around, the water delivery truck is still running, the driver dead at the wheel, rotten. __V__ and ABnormal start to run toward the exit of the alley, #8 and #9 leap in front of them, they turn and run back toward the door, ABnormal trips, __V__ keeps running and leaves her behind, she backs toward the wall while the two masked men stand over her, #9 pulls out a needle and #8 pulls out a test tube, #9 pokes her with the needle and puts it in the test tube, the fluid inside turns blue* Masked Man #8: It's positive. *The two men step back and aim the guns at ABnormal, just before they fire they are smashed by the delivery truck with __V__ at the wheel, he stops and gets out* __V__: Sorry about that... ABnormal: It's alright. *A bullet flies between them, they look up and see #7 leaning from a window shooting at them, they run back inside, just as 5 and 6 make it to the bottom, they aim their guns at him and tell him "Freeze", __V__ and ABnormal put their hands up, Neverending gets to the bottom of the stairs shortly after and shoots both of the masked men* __V__: Thanks. Neverending: I hope you know you owe me now, especially you, heh heh. *Neverending raises his eyebrows to ABnormal* __V__: You guys ready to get out of here? *#7 rushes to the bottom of the stairs, he pulls the trigger and his gun clicks. __V__ punches him, he then proceeds to take his gun and shove it into his chest, __V__, Neverending, and ABnormal exit the building and start to ride off in the delivery truck, they get a short way before the gas runs out* __V__: Shit. *The 3 get out of the truck, a Hummer stops next to them, #10 gets out* __V__: So uh... I take it from your Hummer that you're more of a fist-fight kinda guy? *#10 nods and drops his gun to the ground* __V__: One second. *__V__ points at the apartment building and whispers to Neverending and ABnormal* __V__: Go hide in there, room #69, that's my room. *__V__ gives them the key* __V__: Go. *ABnormal kisses __V__ on the lips, they keep their lips locked for a few moments, then Neverending and ABnormal run, #10 picks up the gun to stop them, __V__ slaps it out of his hand* __V__: Hey, I thought this was supposed to be a fair fight. *They put their fists up and #10 takes the first swing which knocks __V__ to the ground, he then proceeds to kick __V__ in the ribs until he is coughing up blood* __V__: To hell with this, I'm not fighting fair. *__V__ grabs #10's leg and pulls him to the ground, he punches him between the legs several times before finally standing and stomping his head in and taking his gun, __V__ turns and rushes toward the apartment building, he goes up the stairs to the top floor and gets to room 69, he looks in the window and sees #11 and #12, ABnormal is sitting in the bed, she then falls over lifeless, __V__ kicks the door open, shoots #11 in the head and charges at #12, tearing his mask off, he is revealed to be VampiricClown, VampiricClown responds to the de-masking by shooting __V__ through the chest, he hits the ground still breathing, short of breath, he looks at ABnormal, not a single bullet wound, it looks like her flesh is rotting rapidly, he realizes she was diseased* __V__: She had it and I... *Neverending charges out from a closet he was hiding in, VampiricClown grabs him and throws him to the ground, puts his foot on his throat and blows Neverending's brains out, __V__ shoots Vampiric Clown in the back of the leg, he falls down, __V__ pulls himself on top of him and spits right into VampiricClown's mouth before dying, VampiricClown pushes __V__'s body off of him and stands* VampiricClown: I have it now, I'm going to have to suffer through my flesh rotting from the inside out... I can't do it. *VampiricClown stands up and walks to the balcony, he looks at the parking lot below and leaps off, he hits the ground with a splat just as a giant truck marked "Antidote" drives by* |
*Massacre Man stands up as the wolf approaches him, he turns and sees the wolf version of Tic*
Massacre Man: You've gotta be fucking kidding me... *Massacre Man kicks Bleeding_AngelGirl in the face and jumps onto the bed with MissMacabre, he grabs her hand and and runs out of the room, they go into the woods, Massacre Man finds a hollowed out, rotting tree* Massacre Man: Get in there. *MissMacabre ducks into the hole, Massacre Man sees the outhouse, he runs inside and sits down, he goes to turn the lock, but there isn't one.* Massacre Man: It smells like the Holocaust... *the 2 wolves surround the outhouse, impossible to tell apart now, they start to scratch it* Massacre Man: Fuck, occupied! occupied! *The wolves knock over the outhouse, the top falls off and Massacre Man rolls out of it, he gets up and runs back into the cabin, he starts tossing beer bottles on the ground* Massacre Man: I've gotta be fucking retarded to think this will work... *Massacre Man starts to stab Dude Guadalupe more and more so the blood drips out and mixes with the beer, Massacre Man slips out of the back window and watches the wolves walk in, crushing the broken glass, he watches them lick up the alcohol-filled blood* Massacre Man: Holy shit, it's actually working. *Dude Guadalupe wakes up and starts licking it up* Massacre Man: That's just fucking strange. *Massacre Man starts to walk away quietly, he starts headed toward the road when the wolves burst out after him, he runs back into the woods and starts zig-zagging through the trees, the wolves keep hitting them or stumbling to the ground* Massacre Man: Haha! They're fucking drunk! *Massacre Man trips, he spots Rayne walking from her house, her back toward Massacre Man* Massacre Man: *Quietly to himelf* Oh, thank God, help. *Just as he is about to yell he spots the bloody chainsaw* Massacre Man: *Quietly to himself* Nevermind... *Massacre Man gets up and starts running again, he makes it back to where the tow truck was, the body of the wolf he killed is gone, the head it also missing* Massacre Man: That just doesn't make sense. *A headless wolf body runs at him with only 2 legs, Massacre Man leaps to the side* Massacre Man: Come the fuck on! *Massacre Man hops onto the back of the tow truck and waits for the wolf body to come for him, he swings the hook on the back of the truck which catches the wolf, he hops off, the wolf is unable to get off, Massacre Man smiles at what he'd done, he hears a growling, the head of the wolf is about to bite his feet* Massacre Man: You guys are fucking stubborn... *Massacre Man puts the wolf head on the floor of the tow truck's cab, Dude Guadalupe's wolf, obvious because of the head wounds leaps out but stumbles over again, another wolf walks out and mounts it, Massacre Man looks below the two wolves* Massacre Man: Tic! Ewww! *Bleeding_AngelGirl's wolf walks slowly out of the woods, throwing up all over the ground, Massacre Man runs to Rayne's house, the door is locked, he throws himself through the door, he spots the bodies of Disease and Jenna26 and recognizes them, he stares Jenna26 in the face* Massacre Man: Serves you right, bitch! I hope you suffered through every fucking minute of it! *Massacre Man remembers what he was doing, he looks at all of her weapons, and chooses a sledge hammer, Bleeding_AngelGirl walks in, the rays of the morning sun shine in, she turns back into the a person and hits the ground, hung over* Massacre Man: Wow, that actually makes this easier. Bleeding_AngelGirl: Shhhhhhh! *Massacre Man smashes her skull with the hammer and walks back to the tow truck, he sees Tic laying on Dude Guadalupe naked, Dude is already dead from the head wounds, Illdojo and Roderick Usher appear next to Massacre Man* Illdojo: Eww, he had sex with a dead body. Why would somebody do that? *Massacre Man and Roderick Usher look awkwardly at Illdojo* Illdojo: Oh yeah. *Massacre Man smashes in Tic's head, along with Dude's just in case* Massacre Man: Oh yeah, that girl. *Massacre Man runs to the rotting tree* Massacre Man: I'm here, they're all dead. *He gets around the tree and looks inside, MissMacabre is laying inside of it gutted* Massacre Man: Shit... *Rayne puts a plastic bag over Massacre Man's head and pulls on it tight, Massacre Man turns and leans against the rotting tree, they fall through it, Massacre Man puts his finger through the bag making a hole to breathe through, he tears the bag open and pushes Rayne to the ground* Massacre Man: Why does nobody in the movies do that? *Massacre Man drags Rayne to the lake at which she killed Gorephobia and drowns her in it, yelling at her the whole time he's doing it* Massacre Man: This is for making lose an eye, this is for making me lose my feet, this is for making me miss Tales From The Crypt, this is for making run from zombies, this is for making me get eaten by zombies, this is for making me possessed by a fucking book, this is for making fight a monkey, this is for making fight a werewolf, this is for killing my friends and making me go fucking crazy enough to get visits from them in my head but not crazy enough to not be annoyed by it, this is for killing every fucking person I've come into contact with in the last 2 days, this is for knocking over the outhouse I was in and covering me in century-old grey shit. FUCK YOU! *Rayne stops moving, Massacre Man kicks her body into the water and starts to walk off* Massacre Man: I'm fucking indestructable! Hey God! Bring on whatever the fuck you want! I'll take it! I can't be killed! It's fucking impossible! *Massacre Man lays down on the ground and closes his eyes to relax after all of this time, when he opens his eyes and looks among the tops of the trees he gets an extremely panicked look, you can't see what he's looking at* Massacre Man: No, fuck no, please, fuck no. *The screen goes black, a monkey's shriek can be heard* THE END |
Body Count (As well as I remember)
Gorephobia-Piped by Rayne Disease-Throat Cut by Rayne Those assholes __V__ and ABnormal worked with-Shot or dieased by the water Masked Man #1-Head smashed by __V__ Masked Man #3-Shot by __V__ Masked Man #2-Knobbed by __V__ Ferretchucker-He's small. Vodstok-Nailed by Rayne Jenna26-Chainsaw'd by Rayne Masked Man #8-Run over by __V__ Masked Man #9-Run over by __V__ Masked Man #5-Shot by Neverending Masked Man #6-Shot by Neverending Masked Man #7-Got a gun in the chest. Masked Man #10-Nuts smashed, head crushed by __V__ ABnormal-Rotted Masked Man #11-Shot in the head by __V__ Neverending-Shot in the head by VampiricClown __V__-Shot in the heart by VampiricClown VampiricClown-Commits suicide after __V__ spits in his mouth Bleeding_AngelGirl-Head smashed in by Massacre Man Dude Guadalupe-Died from head wounds caused by Massacre Man Tic-Head smashed in my Massacre Man MissMacabre-Gutted by Rayne Rayne-Drowned by Massacre Man (Supposed) Survivors: Massacre Man, Masked Man #4. |
HDC the Movie - Part V
Thunder rumbles in the distance, followed by huge bolts of lightning which act as bright flashes...revealing a huge jungle drenched by torrential rain. A small muddy path runs through the centre...and the scene zooms on a stagecoach pulled by 6 puffing, wet horses...which winds its way through the arduous terrain...
The driver, wearing a long, dark grey cloak, whips the horses in a furious frenzy...muttering under his breath and looking up and around. The cloak falls back a bit...and the face is revealed to be that of alkytrio666's... alkytrio666: Blast this rain! If only I knew about this sooner, we wouldn't have left Drongo Pass for Synthelvania!! Inside the stagecoach, 3 people sit huddled in their corners...covering themselves tightly. 2 of them got blankets...while the remaining one tightens his jacket around him...his face partially hidden by his huge cowboy hat tipped to one side. He is apparently taking a nap, unmindful of all the shaking and bobbing. Stranger 1 (annoyed): The weather was fine when we left Drongo Pass. Where did this hellish rain come from?! Stranger 2 (anxiously): Damned if I know! The sky was clear as crystal too...I feel very afraid... Stranger 1: Lets hope our driver is a skillful one and reaches our destination safely. Stranger 2 nods, shaking and quivering, slightly drenched. A wisp of long hair on one side hints that she is a woman...and a very nervous one. Stranger 1 looks outside wistfully at the sky, revealing a pair of big, grey eyes...and long, drawn out looks. It is VampiricClown. VampiricClown (shaking his head): This doesn't look good...not good at all! Stranger 2 looks up and shakes her head, and a sudden flash of lightning reveals her face. It is Hammerfan. Hammerfan: Do you think this rain will stop soon? VampiricClown: I don't think so. At least, not yet. alkytrio666 whips the horses again. The whole countryside is lit up by sudden flashes of lightning, and the thunder becomes deafening. Suddenly the coach lurches as if it will tip to one side, but it straightens with speed. alkytrio666: I hope we don't lose a wheel. I can't see a damn thing in this rain! The huge shake causes the 3rd stranger to stir...and he opens his eyes slowly with a slightly annoyed look. His eyes are a bright green...and a small hint of sharp teeth and a snarl quickly disappear from his face with the flash of lightning outside. This is ___V___. ___V___ (in a deep, echoing voice): You both chose the wrong night to travel... VampiricClown (surprised but slightly annoyed): We certainly didnt know things would get worse so quickly. ___V___ (looking outside with a gleam in his eyes): You have no idea how worse it can get... Hammerfan (nervously): What do you mean? ___V___ points at the distance, and both VampiricClown and Hammerfan peer out of the window. The lightning bolts blaze the sky in a brilliant hue, and the rocky terrain is revealed in full glory for a few seconds. In the distance, many faint lights are revealed between the rocks and trees. Hammerfan (sitting back slowly, wide-eyed): Wh-What are th-th-those? ___V___ (staring at Hammerfan directly without blinking): Wolves. VampiricClown (stammering): Y-You got-tta be kiddd-dding me-eee...in this-ss hea-vvvyyy rain-nnn? ___V___ (turning his glance back outside): Yes. The stagecoach passes through a clump of trees, and everything goes dark for a few minutes...a loud rumble causes it to shake real bad. VampiricClown peers out and yells. VampiricClown: HEY ALKY! WATCH OUT WHERE YOU ARE GOING! A bolt of lightning cracks through the sky, followed by a loud rumble of thunder...and the scene before him makes VampiricClown's hairs stand. Because the driver's seat is empty... |
VampiricClown slowly gets back in, shaking and shivering...eyes wide, open-mouthed. Hammerfan takes one look at him and pales.
Hammerfan (gulping): What is it, VampiricClown? VampiricClown (shaking): Alky...I-hh-he's gone! Hammerfan: gone? where? VampiricClown (yelling wildly): Gone! As in gone!! Poof!! Like the horns of a donkey! Hammerfan: H-how can that be?! He was out there just now...I heard him!! ___V___ (calmly): He's back. VampiricClown (with disbelief): WHAT?!?! ___V___: Look for yourself. VampiricClown looks outside the window again, and sees a cloaked figure seated where alkytrio was, whipping the horses furiously in the drenching rain. VampiricClown yells out at him, and the figure turns back at him. A huge flash of lightning reveals two eyes under the cloak which burn bright green for a second, then disappear. VampiricClown has no time to react, because just then unseen claws grip him firmly and he is yanked out from the stagecoach into the darkness. Hammerfan: AIEEEEEEEEEEEE!! Th-they g-g-got... ___V___ (watching VampiricClown's legs disappear into the darkness): Wait here. Hammerfan: Wh-Where are you go...? Before Hammerfan could finish her query, ___V___ yanks the door of the shaking stagecoach open, pulls his cowboy hat down firmly, and jumps out into the coal-black night and disappears. Hammerfan shakes uncontrollably, then peers out at the figure which has taken alkytrio's place. A low growl emanates from him, and he glances back. Hammerfan catches a glimpse of protruding, sharp teeth and wild, green eyes in the bolt of lightning which erupts around her...and sinks back into the stagecoach. Hammerfan: D-d-damnit...ah what the hell?! Hammerfan kicks the door outwards, and jumps out of it herself. The mysterious driver whips the horses in a furious frenzy again, and with a renewed wild yelp, the horses pull the coach into the dark jungle where it disappears from sight in a second. Hammerfan gets up slowly...her leg on fire from a deep gash on it. A slow trickle of blood seeps down from her naked wound, and she peers forward from where she stands, hobbling. Just then, another huge bolt of lightning lights up the entire area, and Hammerfan sees a huge mansion some way off to the right from where she is standing, behind a huge gate which creaks slowly in the gusty rain. A sign on it flies wildly from side to side. Hammerfan tries to watch the sign closely by taking a step forward, but just then someone grabs her from behind and closes a hand on her mouth!! |
Hammerfan tries to scream, but a deep voice whispers "Shhhh...!" into her ears. She turns her head slightly to see ___V___ behind her looking intently beyond the gates. She heaves a small breath of relief and nods, and ___V___ unwraps his hand from her mouth and points over her shoulder at the gate sign.
You Are Not Welcome Hammerfan looks on confused, and suddenly becomes aware of soft growls all around her. She turns around to ___V___, but he is not there. In a fit of panic, she wipes her face off the pouring rain and looks around. ___V___ is already near the gate, and he gestures at her to come forward. Hammerfan starts, then suddenly hobbles...losing her balance. ___V___ is beside her in a swift second, holding her up...and putting one of her hands around his shoulders, walks forward to the gate, supporting her. Hammerfan (in-between hobbles): D-do you think we w-w-will be able to f-find someone out here? ___V___ (quietly): Not someone. Some-thing. Hammerfan looks at him for a panicky moment, hoping for a more detailed answer, but the sharp pain of her leg drives that thought out of her mind. She hobbles on forward supported by ___V___ to the gate, and both of them look inside. The gates cover a tattered shed beyond it, and between rows of trees and shrubbery, a long path leads to the desolate mansion...which itself was huge, stretching into the dark sky...totally shrouded in darkness without a single light. ___V___: We have to go in. The wolves are everywhere. Hammerfan (looking around her fearfully): D-d-did they get alk-kytrio and Vamp-pp-piricClown? ___V___ (calmly): No. Something else got them. Hammerfan turns to ___V___ with wild terror in her eyes, but ___V___ is watching something beyond the gates. ___V___: Let's go in. It's safe...for now. ___V___ tries to pull the gates open, but they dont budge too much. He tries pushing it, but the gates stop slightly ahead again. Just then he notices the chain at the bottom of the gates. He grabs a rung and pulls, and the chain comes loose. Hammerfan watches open-mouthed as ___V___ pushes the gates forward and they open out wide with a loud CREAK. Hammerfan (very nervously): How did you open that thick chain? ___V___ does not answer, but keeps looking around them. He helps Hammerfan inside, and closes the gates behind him. Then they walk to the porch of the mansion, and ___V___ walks over to the main door, looking around. The mansion itself looks very eerie, partially hidden by huge trees and shrubs which have outgrown it on all sides. A long corridor separates the porch and the outer door, which stretches on all sides. A single window beside the door looks shut, but the glass on it is cracked. ___V___ tries the door which does not budge from its place, then turns around to Hammerfan. ___V___: Wait here. I'll be back. Hammerfan nods, rubbing her shoulders, shivering. ___V___ disappears from sight for a few seconds, then the front door's bolts are turned back, and it opens with a loud CLANG!, which resonates inside the dark mansion. Hammerfan (trying to peer into the darkness): ___V___? The rain keeps pouring down outside, and a slow but vicious snarl comes from near the door. Hammerfan cant see anything, and suddenly a bright light breaks the darkness in front of her. A stranger stands in front of her, holding a lantern in his hands. He looks quite old and wrinkled. Hammerfan: Who are you? Stranger (in an old, cackling voice): I am the caretaker of this place. My name is neverending. And who might you be, lass? Hammerfan (shivering): I am Hammerfan. I got caught in this terrible storm after ditching my stagecoach. Can I get shelter for the night? neverending looks at her from head to toe, and shakes his head slightly. neverending: You might...if you choose to ignore the night sounds this place makes. Hammerfan: Night sounds? What kind? neverending: You will know. Anyone else with you? Hammerfan: There was another person who helped me to here, ___V___. He went looking for another entrance to the inside. neverending: Come on in then. He will find his way in too. Hammerfan shivers for a couple moments, but too tired and leg hurting, asks no more and hobbles inside. Neverending shuts the door behind her. Hammerfan looks around her, and by the feeble light the lantern offers, sees that she is standing in some sort of a gigantic hall...which has a spiral staircase right in-between which is split into two taperings at the ground floor. A huge chandelier hangs in between the hall, and the staircase leads to further parts of the mansion. Beyond it, rows of rooms can be seen. Also, doors on either side of the hall are visibly apparent. Hammerfan: Wow! This is a big place. You live all alone here? Hammerfan turns around, and finds the lantern on a table beside her. Neverending has disappeared! |
Hammerfan looks around, expecting to see neverending somewhere near, but he's nowhere to be seen. Hammerfan shivers slightly. Just then, a door in front of her slams shut...and the sounds reverberates all around her. Hammerfan picks up the lantern and tries to see in that direction, then slowly takes a step forward.
A voice (deep and ghoulish): STAY PUT!! Hammerfan shivers wildly, the hairs on the back of her neck standing out like pins...and stands rooted to her place. A silvery shadow breaks through the darkness in front and walks up to her. Hammerfan gets ready to scream but the feeble lantern light reveals it to be ___V___. ___V___(slightly annoyed): You never listen to what you are told, do you? Hammerfan (relieved): You ass! You gave me such a fright. I could kiss you!! ___V___: Keep the love to yourself. We have bigger things to worry about. Hammerfan (curiously): Bigger th-...? ___V___: UNHF!!!!! Hammerfan doesn't get a chance to complete her question as something huge with a red furry streak flies through the darkness and grabs ___V___ from behind, lifting him to the upper levels of the mansion. A scuffle is heard, and the mysterious creature comes crashing down somewhere in front of Hammerfan, steam coming out of its nostrils in short bursts. ___V___ jumps down and has his guns unholstered in a flash. ___V___(snarling): You DON'T attack ME! Creature: GROWLLLLLL!!! ___V___ pumps 3 bullets rapidly into the creature, who lets out a big howl and then goes quiet. Hammerfan is sitting down, shivering uncontrollably, biting into her fingers at the scene in front of her. ___V___ walks over to her, reloading his guns. Hammerfan looks disbelievingly at him and at the creature in turns. Hammerfan: wh-what THE HELL WAS TH-THAT?! ___V___ (looking back then replying matter-of-factly): Just a werewolf. Hammerfan (shaking): w-w-werewolf? ___V___ (putting guns back in holsters): Yes. Long story. Hammerfan: Just what the hell is going on around here? ___V___: I dont have time to tell you. There are more around. We better keep moving. Hammerfan (with slight sarcasm): And go where? ___V___: Somewhere in this mansion is a hidden, locked room. There you will find the answers. Come on! ___V___ grabs Hammerfan's arm and lifts her up, and starts forward. Hammerfan: Just a minute. Get the lantern. ___V___: I dont need it. Do you? Hammerfan: Yes I bloody well do! ___V___ grabs the lantern in his other hand, and both of them climb the staircase to the upper level of the mansion. A pair of green eyes watch them keenly, and a low growl emanates from the darkness. |
Hammerfan and ___V___ walk into the hallway above, which has closed doors on both sides.
Hammerfan: If that was a werewolf, how did it die by your bullets? I heard they dont die so easily. And who was the guy who let me in? He said his name was neverending and then he- ___V___: disappeared. All in due time, lady. We are here. ___V___ stops in front of a huge locked door, gets something out of his pocket, and inserts it into the keyhole and turns. There is an unlocking sound, and he pulls the handle downward and pushes. The door opens with a slight creak. He pulls them both quickly inside, and closes the door behind them. ___V___ (quietly): We are safe...for now. Hammerfan (sarcastically): Great. I was beginning to worry. ___V___ (looking at her): You dont believe me, do you? Hammerfan (stretching the hand holding the lantern out): Try me. The room they are in has a locked door on the other side. A window nearby is bolted shut, and they can see a couch and settee in the centre...overlooking an enormous glass bookshelf. ___V___ motions to the couch and Hammerfan walks over, puts the lantern on the table beside the couch, and sinks heavily into it with a deep sigh.___V___ looks around, then tears off a long, thin curtain and walks over to Hammerfan. He then proceeds to bandage her wound tightly. ___V___: We dont want you bleeding all over the place. They smell it and get voracious. Hammerfan: They? ___V___: The things out there. Hammerfan: But you said they were werewolves. ___V___: Technically, yes. Thats what they are. But these are different. They move differently, and can fly for short distances. Hammerfan: f-fly?! ___V___: Yes. It must be the virus... Hammerfan: What virus? ___V___ (taking a deep breath): Ok hear me out. I was a TV news reporter once- ___V___ never gets past the first sentence. A loud thud is heard from the next room behind the locked door on the other side, followed by a deep moan. Both Hammerfan and ___V___ instantly turn towards the door. Hammerfan (whispering): Wh-what could it be? ___V___ (whispering back): Wait here. And this time I mean it. ___V___ walks over to the locked door and listens for a few moments. He then tries the handle, but it doesnt budge. He looks around and notices a key hanging from the wall beside the door. He grabs it and tries it on the keyhole, and the door unlocks. ___V___ looks below the door for a second, and satisfied...opens the door slightly. He peers into the room beyond. ___V___ (in a low voice to himself): Oh...my...GOD!!! |
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