my theme song

[josh]

this is my theme song everyone

(Spoken)
Folks, I'd like to sing a song about the American dream.
About me, about you, about the way our American hearts beat way down
in the bottom of our chests. About that special feeling we get in the
cockles of our hearts, maybe below the cockles, maybe in the subcockle
area. Maybe in the liver. Maybe in the kidneys. Maybe even in the
colon, we don't know.

(Sung)
I'm just a regular Joe with a regular job.
I'm your average white suburbanite slob.
I like football and porno and books about war.
I got an average house with a nice hardwood floor.

My wife and my job, my kids and my car.
My feet on my table...and a cuban cigar.

But sometimes that just ain't enough to keep a man like me interested
no way
No, I've gotta go out and have fun at someone else's expense
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

I drive really slow in the ultra-fast lane,
While people behind me are going insane.

I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole

I use public toilets and I piss on the seat,
I walk around in the summertime saying "How about this heat?"

I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole

Sometimes I park in handicapped spaces,
While handicapped people make handicapped faces.

I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole

Maybe I shouldn't be singing this song
Ranting and raving and carrying on
Maybe they're right when they tell me I'm wrong...

NAAAAH!

I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole

(Spoken)
Know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna get myself a 1967 Cadillac El Dorado
Convertible, hot pink, with whaleskin hubcaps and all-leather cow
interior and big brown baby seal eyes for headlights... yeah! And I'm
gonna drive around in that baby at 115 miles per hour, getting 1 mile
per gallon, suckin' down quarter pound cheeseburgers from McDonald's
in the old-fashioned non-biodegradable styrofoam containers and when
I'm done suckin' down those greaseball burgers I'm gonna wipe my mouth
on the American Flag and then I'm gonna toss the styrofoam containers
right out the side, and there ain't a goddamn thing anybody can
do about it. You know why? Because we got the bombs, that's why Two
words: Nuclear fuckin' weapons, OK? Russia, Germany, Romania, they
can have all the democracy they want...they can have a big democracy
cakewalk right through the middle of Tienamen Square and it won't make
a lick of difference, because we got the bombs, OK? John Wayne's not
dead, he's frozen! And as soon as we find a cure for cancer, we're
gonna thaw out the Duke and he's gonna be pretty pissed off. You know
why? Have you ever taken a cold shower? Well, multiply that by 15
million times, that's how pissed off the Duke's gonna be.
I'm gonna get the Duke and John Casavetti and Lee Marvin

and Sam Peckinpaw

and a case of whisky

and drive to Texas...(HEY, HEY HEY!>



Why don't you shut up and sing the song, pal?

(Sung)
I'm an asshole
I'm an asshole
A S-S H-O L-E
Everybody, A S-S H-O L-E
Arf, Arf Arf, Arf Arf, Arf Arf
Thoomph A-thoom-thoom A-thoom-thoom A-thoom-thoom
Oooooooo

(Spoken)
I'm an asshole and I'm proud of it

[downside]

That was original...oh wait...no it wasn't.

Seriously though, first you posted a thread about Christmas, and now this? You might want to stick with Horror related topics, rather than just anything you feel like talking about.

[josh]

shut the fuck up u dont own me

[downside]

Originally posted by josh
shut the fuck up u dont own me

Correct. I don't own. Truthfully, I'm not sure I'd spend the money to buy you. And if I got you as a gift...I'd probably take you back and exchange you for someone cooler.

Take it easy, kiddo. I'm just trying to lessen the blow of other that are gonna get on this site later today and possibly make more rude remarks than mine.

[josh]

kiddo how old r you

[downside]

Originally posted by josh
kiddo how old r you

Old enough to use punctuation. Those are the keys surrounding the letters you're using currently.

I'm only 23, but from your tone, I'd say might even be lying about your age. I'd say you were a tad younger than the 18 you claim to be. Besides, I'm trying to give you some helpful advice. Just take it and be happy.

[josh]

actuall i write fast i ahve no time for writing perfect i am 18 and dont accuse me of lying about my age

[_Leatha_Face_]

god damn it gets better everyday with this guy

[downside]

Originally posted by josh
actuall i write fast i ahve no time for writing perfect i am 18 and dont accuse me of lying about my age

I'm afraid I already did. And you're not making too much advancement in the other direction. Still, your sticktoitiveness is a bonus. Kudos on that.

Again, and for the last time, I'm just trying to warn you. If you think I'm pushing, just wait till some of the real wolves get their paws on you.

[josh]

real wolves paws on me this is the internet ok they cant touch so get lost kudos

[downside]

Originally posted by josh
real wolves paws on me this is the internet ok they cant touch so get lost kudos

I sometimes can't believe you know what you're trying to write. But I think I got that one.

And hence why I think you're probably 12ish. It was a metaphor, meaning as soon as other, more mean people (wolves) see the type of stuff you write, they'll probably insult you more than I have (paw in you). It's an expression.

[josh]

Oh. Sorry my writing sucks to you. I thought you were more mature let me give you reasons why i dont write the best on the internet

A: Takes to long

B: I think as long as you can read it it's fine

C: who gives a damn

There you go pal. Now lets end it!:mad:

[downside]

Originally posted by josh
Oh. Sorry my writing sucks to you. I thought you were more mature let me give you reasons why i dont write the best on the internet

A: Takes to long

B: I think as long as you can read it it's fine

C: who gives a damn

There you go pal. Now lets end it!:mad:

That's kinda the point. Some of the things you've written haven been nothing but jumbled words in a long line. Plus, you're off-handed topics aren't so much horror-related, which is somewhat required on a horror website.

Again, no need to get pushy. My original complaint is that you seem to be posting anything you want about anything, so long as it is not horror. You (a) could find another place to do that and (b) might be surprised when you're suddnely attacked by others on this site.

This was all just a big warning to you.

[josh]

Everyone hates me so much then i'll leave sorry i had some fun i guess your not allowed good fucking bye

[downside]

Originally posted by josh
Everyone hates me so much then i'll leave sorry i had some fun i guess your not allowed good fucking bye

Hey. Have fun. Just like the rest of us. Just try to not be so twelve.

[moonsorrow]

meh...my theme song

token of time by ensiferum

"i set sails for the ageless winds
no fear of dying or a thought of surrender
i threaten every barrier on my way
im bound forever to the token of time."

[FreddyFan]

mines would be holdin on by saliva.

[big black]

don't worry josh will be back! But not as josh...he's really around 15 and he's really a girl! O my! And she's a little whiny bitch with no social skills. OMG....I sound like a snob...I'm gonna go away now. I love this place...everybody is so entertaining!...kinda

[friday13thfan]

Mine would be Sevendusts Face to Face